Episode 24

And I think one of the easiest examples is as more and more people are looking in the psychology world, their families, right? Or a lot more people are using the word trauma, sometimes like little t trauma, right? Or big t trauma to kind of describe how our nervous system is kind of wired depending on our experiences.

And you have different shamonic or more earth based paganistic traditions around the world that have always had ways to describing trauma or they might say soul loss, right? Like in psychology people will say, oh I got really scared or upset and I dissociated. I kind of left my body.

Or I wasn't there. grounded. I have shamonic traditions that will talk about doing soul retrievals cuz a piece of the soul leaves in order to remain safe. So there's really amazing as we start studying and seeing the ways that we describe sort of the nervous system or some of the ways emotionally that we go through difficult things, there are completely parallel ways that different spiritual cultures again have known this.

Especially a lot of indigenous knowledge has known this for a long time. And I think as you heard or as you said in my bio, plants are such a big medicine for that too. And it feels like in the psychology realm, there's a lot more around not just the mind, the somatic, the energy body, the nutrition, right.

All kind of holistic sort of piece. So the intersection for me is not only the mental body, but definitely the physical body, the etheric body, the spiritual, all that kind of stuff. A lot more of a holistic place coming in. And even on a weekly basis, I'll have people reach out and say things like, yeah, you know, I'm having a spiritual awakening.

I can sense things. I can see things, but I have so much anxiety that I don't know how to trust it.

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I mean, we are electrical beings. Yeah. If our heart doesn't have the right electrical charge, it stops. That's it. And that's one of the ways that I like to explain to people that everything is electricity, everything is energy and that's what's holding us together.

And if it's what's holding us together, then why aren't we paying more attention to that?

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One of the things that you mentioned in your bio is soul essence. So what do you mean by that? How can you describe that for us?

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Even Einstein knew this are energies never created just or destroyed. So where did it go? Right. And so Buddhism takes the perspective and a lot of other religions or philosophies take the perspective that we have multiple lives in a way. And so what is that energy that is that inner light, that lighthouse, right?

Like inside that core, we may call it Chi, we might call it consciousness. There's this higher self-wise soul part that is aware and it's lit up and it's kind, and it comes through our emotions. It comes through our right temporal lobe is typically where it lives as they're studying consciousness and it's up from, but it's this brilliant energy of knowing this.

And it has such deep wisdom and nourishment, and most people can tap into it when they let themselves feel joy. There's this sense, I have a lot going on, but I trust it and I'm okay. And I don't have to make a big of deal out of something or, you know, this is hard, but I'll be okay. There's this acknowledgement of our rooted sense of trusting the part of us that's been through a lot and actually is gonna make it through in a way.

So, I think of soul essence as almost this deep wise part of ourselves that has lived a lot, that has been through a lot. And when we tap into that and we're more aware of it and it becomes our internal compass, we stop getting lost in the thought loops of like, is this true?

Is it not true? Should starts getting out of our own?

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Right. And we when we out of it, it's the part of us that continues to live on.

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And now of course I tap into that a lot, especially when I'm working with clients or I'm working through something in my own life. But I hadn't connected it until just now that what I call wise Laurin is the same thing as soul essence. It's the same thing as higher being, higher self, whatever.

I just happen to call it wise Laurin cuz she's so freaking wise you know.

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And so there sometimes I feel like the left brain, or even like the capitalistic structure and the United States is like, this is the way to do it. Right. If you do this, you get this. And so there's this push around people like, oh, I have to find the perfect thing, but it doesn't really happen like that. It happens in years of all of our different experiences.

I feel like we were younger, it's grass beer, and then you get older and you're like, yeah, just another grain of rice in the rice jar. Like…

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Wise Xandra, highest self, soul essence. And so the way that I do it, and the way that I've learned best is informed by psychology, energy healing, and spirituality. And so the way that I do it, I have a few different layers of like what I teach, but I'm a really big believer that we start in the roots.

And so there's a lot of folks. I tend to specialize in working with people that are very sensitive and empathic. And it's a lot about I'm a really high spiritual energy. A lot of people come to me and they're like, I've had gifts my whole life, but I can't figure out how to get in my body. I can't figure out how to get in my roots so I can trust that information.

Or there's a lot of folks that are like, I take on energy and I don't know how to let it go. Right. I can't be in big crowds or I don't have good boundaries because I'm scared that if I put boundaries down, someone else will hurt and then I'll feel it. And then I'll feel worse. It's a lot of things that I hear.

And so I have a particular map called root medicine where we go through and we learn very specific energy tools to really learn how to run the energy and the body differently so that you actually learn how to release energy. A lot of people will say like, I know I should let this go, but I don't know how. And I'm like, this is how, this is how to actually energetically watch the thought leave your body with permission and curiosity and with a level of amusement, right.

Because if we could be like, oh, here's this thing I get stuck on. Right. Versus, oh, I'm bad. Here I am again. As you know, curiosity allows that to move faster.

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That's a lot more affordable where people are doing the modules online but we have community meetings every week. And I work kind of in a group with folks to sort of more workable. But I would say the program, the meeting people love the most is the fourth meeting. And we actually help that person tune in and find their one of their spirit guides that actually, and then helps them do energy healing work.

That's kind of the beginning of how I help. And then as that person's running their energy more and more, and kind of opening that psychic wifi station, then we going on field trips and things like that.

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They just don't know how to do that. And so that's, it's interesting to me, cuz that's always where I have to start with a new client is I start teaching them how to actually century roots down essentially is how I describe it into the earth and to let mother earth nurture us.

We're a generation that weren't taught to nurture ourselves, That that was selfish. So, it's interesting that you're getting the people that are coming on board now. I get more people that have actually been aware of this kind of stuff for quite a long time generally, but have never done anything with it. Have never gotten any help around it.

And so it's, everything's just expressing physically and we can clear so much shit so fast once we get them grounded and understanding how that energy works. It's really fascinating work but…

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She's like, that's kind of how we were programmed in a way, cuz we were even we were at an energy conference and she had a stomach ache and I was like, mom, you know, if you put your hand on your stomach and that was brand new to her of like my body's in pain. I can energetically put my hand on my stomach and like actually do energy work.

She had no idea how to actually, she was like, really how, how do you do that? And I was like, oh yeah, like…

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So, yeah, so it's interesting to me. I love that the younger people are coming in and wakening up faster than my generation did. And I love that they have the opportunity to not carry all of this traumatic crap with them through the rest of their lives. They can do more good because they'll be less hurting.

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But they're all so sensitive and they're all like, how do I run my energy? And they're all very psychic, but they've never felt empowered sort of in that in a way it's there's a sense of difference. So I'm also curious as more and more generations come in. I don't know necessarily; I can't say what's impacting those clinical diagnosis.

Whether sort of parenting or generational or nutrition or things like that. But the younger generation is saying, I know what energy is and I don't know how to run mine and they can directly say that versus having to push it down and just pretend it's not there and hurt for decades. Like, or not having resources.

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I know from my place of wisdom, having lived six decades that because they're coming into these gifts so early, and because there is this support system, like you and me in so many others, they're gonna get moved through that difficult time so much faster and with greater ease and better understanding of who they are and why they're here and what they can do for the world.

And God, that's what we need.

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They're feeling it. Maybe they don't. I know empaths often cuz I have been one my whole life and didn't know it until, you know, 45 but you're taking on so much of what's going on around you.

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So, I'm grateful for it so much at the time it has been very useful. So, for people who perhaps are like some of the millennials, I know cuz I have to, they came in sort of before my generation got real clear on this and they're the ones that I see having a real problem with depression, anxiety.

I know that my daughter knows she has gifts, but there's a resistance there because they didn't grow up with this.

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That kind of stuff, paranormal, it would happen in the house. But I actually had an experience where I lost control of my body and like a spirit invaded my space. So similar how you talk about like, ooh really hard experiences, but really catapulted you into work. Right? Or like feeling self. That was my experience at just like 15, 16, something like that.

And so my mom took me to a psychotherapist and she took me to a psychic medium, and guess where, what direction we went. right. We went to the…

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And so it is tricky as a teenager when you have sort of these gifts, because it's so easy to feel isolated by them because no one's talking about them. So you're like, here's this thing that I have. That's a weakness that I have to hide because it doesn't allow me to feel like I belong. And they're old enough where they're not looking to parents.

Like if you start modeling that behavior, when they're 16 or 17, it's almost too late. In way, they love you, but you're not necessarily their number one mentor right anymore. So a lot of parents are picking up and doing the work and changing their energy. And of course that impacts the household, but the teenagers looking beyond you at that point.

The earlier that the parents go, oh, I have to ground myself. Oh, I have to run my energy because kids, right. They match that parental energy of safety. They match that energy. So when I do like psychic conferences, I'll have the five or six. I've done readings for 5, 6, 7 year olds. It's cute. Well, do their past lives.

I'll be like, yeah. Tell me about that. Like it's parents are like, yeah, they're pushing us to learn. And so there is something contractually around a parent. When you bring a kiddo in, you are contracting to learn from them. They're gonna push in so many ways.

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They pick up on a lot of energy. I'm also probably sensitive. Parents start realizing that they're sensitive, but they pushed it down. There's a genetic piece to that a little bit too. So the more that parents are able to start learning how to run their energy, the more they create space for that kid to have permission to let energy go start creating that kind of psychic connection with the kid of like my nervous systems grounded.

Here's how you can ground yours in a way. But once they get into teenager mode, it's unfortunately in some way, it's their journey to decide. Do I want to put this on a shelf for several years? Right? Because belonging is more important to me right now. Or am I okay with allowing these gifts to unfold because the timing is really important there for kids.

You can't push people. I've seen so many parents be like, fix my kid and they put them in psychotherapy and I'll be like, do you really wanna be here? And they're like, no, my mom can't handle me. And so that's why I'm here. So pushing kids to be someplace that they're not is tricky. And sometimes kids aren't willing to say yes to those things until they're more so in their mid twenties, even thirties where they're like, Ooh, I had this and it wasn't safe enough because of my environment to open it up.

And now I feel resourced enough to do it truly.

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And so I'd get short of breath. It was, a miraculous discovery. And I discovered it because of my son's health issues and I was determined to get him help. I wasn't gonna sit there and go, oh, maybe he's just he's 18 months old, but it's hard. Doesn't work as good as it should or something.

No, when your baby can't breathe, you see somebody, you do something about it. And actually he's the one that led me into alternative health because I ended up taking him to a Chinese doctor who did acupuncture nerves and turned things around so dramatically.

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It's like, oh, I got an intuitive hit about what I should do. Or this situation versus psychic is a little bit more like a wifi station on the top of your head where you're like, ooh, let me look at this. Sort of let me look at that. But it's right. It's a little bit more out of the body sort of in a way.

Definitely. Again, I, I always say wifi station.

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It it's through my wifi station, but it's just something beings have appeared to me my whole life. I would see people standing in corners. I have a lot of the clairaudience kind of stuff where I can hear people pretty well. And so mediumship has always been almost like a walkie talkie kind of a thing sort of for me.

And my definition of mediumship in a way is being able to communicate with things in different dimensional spheres. Right? So the fact matter of like there are different animals that have different abilities to tune into certain energy fields. Whether it's, I think, I can't remember if deer are a lot of this, but like butterflies and bees, right?

They see ultraviolet light. They can see different lighter energies that we can't. Time runs differently for different beings because of how they process sort of energy. And so for me, it's almost like taking a walkie talkie and being able to click into these different sort of dimensional spaces where energy's running differently and being able to oftentimes communicate with other spirits.

A lot of times I communicate with me in the future and me in the past to do a lot of healing where me in the future.

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Or like, ooh, this would be a really beautiful thing. I pause and I take a mental picture of the feeling and I send it backwards almost like a text or almost like a letter to my previous surpassed self and say almost like a breadcrumb and say like, hey, it's gonna be okay. And it's interesting as I've started doing that, I remember memories where I'd be really sad and then I would feel this golden kind of hug energy.

And it used to piss me off as a teenager because it. I was like, I'm sad. Why do I just cry? And now, like, I know everything's gonna be OK. Like it was, I used to get mad. Cause I was like, I, I want to be in my depression but I could never sit there long enough cuz there was always this magical, old trusting feeling that everything would be okay.

And then I started doing this for a few years and then I was like, oh my God, that was me from the future being like…Hey!

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Just remind me, it's gonna be okay to really just get that soul hello. I call it in a way from our future selves. It's magic.

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I have learned a lot, which is awesome. I appreciate that. This is why I do this, cuz I've a lifelong learner, but I like learning from other people rather than books. So…

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Or what do you think of that? But one of them is named Mary Bell and she ran the psychic horizon center in Boulder, Colorado for 30 or 40 years. She retired last year and just really, really amazing. She really brought in the, like before working with her, I didn't really understand how impactful amusement is.

Like when someone would say bemused to me that meant bypassing. It meant like not taking something seriously, right. Or not being grounded or earthy enough. And she would say like, go make some trouble, play, be amused. Right? Like there was just this level of lightness where she would say, rather than being hard on yourself, can you be amused and playful around like, oh, there I do that again.

Oh, I need to take that on. And so she really brought that word alive for me. And it's been such medicine. It's been such medicine when something gets kicked up that's old in my system. How can I be amused and sweet and like with grace. Right. And bring that in. So that's been, she's been a really wise teacher to me and another person who's been teaching also for 30 or 40 years as well.

His name is Michael Tamora and he is also a psychic medium teacher. And I work a lot, again, one on one with him, sort of in my head space. And every time I talk with him, he's laughing. Like he laughs before he responds in a way. And I tend to be a verbal processor. I have so many words up there that come shooting out and he he'll gimme like a four or five word answer and it's perfect.

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And I tend to, my background is being from Minnesota, a lot of like Nordic Germanic, like grit mentality like resting is like still doing chores. Basically. Like the idea of rest is just like not working in that way. So for me, I am like an over activator. I have a lot of quick start energy.

So anything self-care related is literally moving at a turtle pace. It is where I grab a bunch of blankets and I literally make like a nest on the floor and I call it starfish time where I like starfish on the ground and I breathe and I just let my nervous system pause. And that's actually, it's pretty difficult for me, but it's absolutely nourishing because I get so much joy out of creation.

I have a lot of Sagittarius, kinda a lot of fire energy. So to ground and earth and self-care and actually feel into what rest actually means when you let tension out of the body, when you go, oh, can I let my jaw do that? Like, it's, it's pretty tricky for me as an over activator to do that work. So that's the most nourishing, it's tricky, but it's incredibly beneficial for me.

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It's so I understand how hard it can be to stop if that's not in your DNA,

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And learning just to kind of.

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So nice balance there. What lights you up when you're feeling down,

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Right? Like, like grumpy, like, you know, or whatever it is. Like, there's an energy, right. I'm running kind of like a dark, dark blue or something. That's just kindy sort of in a way, I've told my guides, if you could please send me like a psychic text message that says you're a soul. Just, just remember your soul.

Like, there's a, there's a really cool reminder of like, oh yeah, like I'm a soul, like I'm learning. Like it's okay. Like my body is the sacred thing. My emotions are sacred things, but I'm not those things at the same time. Like there's a lot of pieces here. So when I remember that I'm a soul, when I'm down, I'm like, oh, you're a soul.

It's okay. You have permission. Right. You're listening. Like it's gonna get better for some reason, reminding myself of that soul essence or that sort of light of like, hey, like you've gone through a lot of things. And I, think a lot of people have that as they get older, there can be softening around, like when you've gone through so many things, there's a little bit more trust that develops over and over about being able to handle things.

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Or there's this, like, how do I keep pushing forward with this behind feeling? And one of the things they would say over and over is like, you just have to hold your frequency. You just have to hold your frequency. And it took a while and they'd always show me a picture of a lighthouse.

And it took me a while to understand that by knowing who I am like by staying connected to me, it runs a really high frequency and it allows people, the things I'm working with to also run at that frequency.

And it's a whole other way of seeing and operating a business instead of this graspy anxious like poverty mentality. It's like, oh, I have everything that I need. And I just have to be able to hold that truth and frequency and everything softens, everything becomes easier.

I don't worry about certain things. And so I use it in every sphere of my life, not just the business world, but definitely like, you just have to hold your frequency. You just have to do that energy work in yourselves and it gives permission. It brings a healing frequency to everything that you do.

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And then I also have a podcast where I geek out on psychology topics and kind of weave in like, how do you work with doubt from the psychology perspective versus energy perspective or that kind of stuff. So that's also, it's all the same name. Soul Essence Center, Soul Essence Wellness Center.

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I just love your energy. It's just so fun to play in it with you. So I hope that everybody gets some of the same wisdom or some of their own wisdom from this. And maybe we'll have to have you back.

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And I hope that you'll come back next week. Every Tuesday, we release a brand-new episode. Sometimes we have fabulous, beautiful, marvelous guests. And sometimes it's just me and you can pick and choose, but it's always something that's gotten my curiosity inspired. I hope to see you next time.

Xandra thank you for being here.

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If you want to know more about me or my intuitive energy healing practice Heartlight wellness, please head over to my website www.heartlightjoy.com.

Curiously Wise is a team effort. I am grateful for the skill and enthusiasm. Arlene Membrot, our producer, and Sam Wittig, our audio engineer, bring to this collaboration. Our music is Where the Light Is by Lemon Music Studio.

I'm Laurin Wittig. Please join me again next week for another episode of Curiously Wise. From my heart to yours, may your life be filled with love, light, joy, and of course, curiosity.

Curiously Wise: Practical Spirituality in Action

Episode 24

Tapping into your Soul Essence with Xandra Hawes

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Laurin Wittig