Leading From Within: Overcoming Procrastination with Laurin Wittig

 Hi friends and welcome back to Curiously Wise. I'm Laurin Wittig, your host, and I am struggling with procrastination and I know that's a pretty common thing. So I thought, well, I'm just going to jump on here and see what comes up because I have not been able to really focus on what I want my next solo to be.

And as a result of that, I have been rearranging my podcast release calendar. So my solo gets pushed further and further back in the schedule. And I'm kind of up against a wall now. I kind of have to do it and, and I am bad about procrastinating. I can procrastinate. I'm like a master procrastinator, I'm going to say that carefully.

And so I just, I want to just kind of walk you through how I'm dealing with this right now, because there are things I'm really excited about, but they're new, they're new aspects I'm bringing to my work. I'm not abandoning anything that I've been doing, but I am bringing a different kind of focus to it and I'm looking forward to bringing that out soon. I don't know if soon is before the new year or just after the new year, but my goal is to by January, have something ready to launch. And and I'm really excited about it. And I have been getting all these downloads of, of ideas and ways to structure this process and all of these things.

And I have time in my schedule. Maybe it's not big blocks of time, but I have time in my schedule to, to focus on this big project, this big focusing in project. And, and there's a lot that I want to learn about it. So I'm feeling a little not qualified. Right. I feel worthy of it. That's a new thing for me because I tend to, I tend to go, well, who am I to think I can do this?

I do feel like it's something that I can do. I will tell you that it's, it's centered around the idea that we all have leadership energy within us and how can we illuminate that to bring it into the world to help make this world what we want it to be. Not the hot mess that it is right now. So that's just the basic idea of where the focus is going to be, but I'm, I mean, I've got ideas for programs and for new circles and a community and all this stuff, but I am frozen in the last week or two, even around getting not just my podcast solo done, but this big project too, this big, exciting, fascinating, curiosity invoking project. And and so I just thought I'd share my process as I start to analyze why.

Because that's the first question I have to ask myself is why am I procrastinating? And. Some of it has to do with the time of year in terms of, I have a couple of trips coming up at the end of the year here and then a big one in, in February where, you know, it's, I'm really looking forward to it, but it's, it's breaking up my, my calendar in terms of instigating something that will go over, you know, four to six weeks.

And so there's, there's that. little piece of it that my brain is going, well, you know, it might not be really, it can't come out until the spring, but and, and that's just not true. That's just not true. There, there's time to do things. It may not be one of the longer six week kinds of things I'm thinking about, but there's time to, to implement and to begin to, to roll out the things that I want to do around this new focus of illuminating the leadership within.

And so, so there's, there's that conversation going on in my head and that conversation is sort of supports procrastination. Oh, well, if it can't come out till March, then, you know, what's the point of working on it now? You've got so much other stuff coming on and going on and, and, and, but I don't really, I mean, I have stuff, there's stuff on my calendar every day, but it's not all day every day.

And I spend a lot of time doing things that don't really need to be done right now because they're mundane, you know, chores around the house taking the dog for an extra long walk, you know, these sorts of things. So, so I, I know that this conversation that's going on in my head is a lot of, of not truths.

They are fears. And, and I, I recognize that because. Among other things, I've been having a really bad stuffy nose and I know from past experience and a lot of healing work that my fears have been expressed through allergies. For most of my life. I cleared them out with the help of a very talented healer a number of years ago. I mean, I think we're probably going on close to eight years, eight or nine years since I've had allergy issues. But I've got this like chronically stuffy nose and I'm, I know, you know, the healer in me knows, Oh, okay. What, what are you afraid of? Cause it's not a full blown allergy, but it's definitely got the, you know, sort of the hallmarks of the beginnings of things that, that used to trigger my allergies.

And so, yeah, so I have to dig in. I have to go. Okay. So it's fear. I know it's fear. This is a symptom of fear. It's how I express physically express subconscious fears. So it's subconscious. So let me dig into it. Let me dig into it. So some of it is This is an area that I do not feel like an expert in.

However, I have this amazing podcast and what do I do on this podcast? I interview people who know amazing things and who I am curious about learning more from. So I have an easy fix for a lot of my feelings around. I don't know that I'm qualified to talk about leadership. Which is, pardon my language, bullshit.

I have been a leader in many different ways at many different times in my life. I have also shirked leadership. I have not wanted to be the leader, but often I had to step up and do it anyway. And I'm good at it. And I have to remember that, that I'm good at it. I have a lot of experience just in, in the, you know, the five years that I have been a professional healer, if you will.

I have done a lot of work where I am a leader. Part of it is when you are a healer, you are leading your client through that process of, of changing and shifting and embracing new. So I know I have the qualifications to talk about leadership. And to guide people into their own personal version of leadership, whatever that is.

And I know that I have the podcast and you would not believe how long a list of people I already have that I didn't even have to look very far for. In fact, a lot of them have come to me, have shown up on my radar, either through other people or through a networking event that I'm like, Oh, I got to talk to that person they're into leadership, and they're doing this really interesting thing with it. So the universe has been bringing me experts. That I can talk to that. I can ask questions of that. I can get curious about. So I'll be bringing those out as as they come. I think the first one will be out in January, I believe.

So I have resources. To support my own learning curve as I move into this, I have been working with a business coach, an intuitive business coach who I absolutely adore. She is so talented and she is so able to help me cut through this kind of stuff. But super fast and then to process it and release whatever needs to be released.

So I have the tools. I have the support. I have this amazing platform where I can ask anybody I want to, to come and have a great conversation with me. And in this case, I want to talk about leadership. Now it's still spiritual based. Because I think that we all need to be leading from the heart. And so we got to get in tune with the heart.

So you know, I know intellectually that I have everything I need. So I can check mark that. Okay. I got that one. So what else has been causing me to procrastinate? And so that gets more into the emotions and the stories and beliefs that I carry around. And one of the big ones is that I will be charging money for this.

I'm an entrepreneur. I have bills to pay. I have a podcast to support. I have, you know, a family that where I need, I have some responsibility to help, you know, provide when we, it's just my husband and I now, cause our kids are grown and on their own, which is amazingly wonderful. The, on their own part, because I, you know, it's like, I feel like I did the job right of being a parent.

But I still feel like I, and I want to contribute. We can do more fun things, beyond just sort of, taking care of the day to day stuff with some extra income coming in. And that's okay to want that. That's the lesson I'm learning. It's okay to want more. I was raised by families from the deep South who had experienced the depression as children.

You know, my grandparents had been just starting their families during the depression generally. And so there's a lot of that lack mentality. And also, and I, I really got this one big as a, as a kid is who are you to want more? You have so much, who are you to want more? So I'm practicing allowing myself to want what I want.

But this new program, this new focus, is triggering that old story of lack.

I literally was just in a webinar just before I got on here to do this one where the guest the guest teacher was talking about money. She's, she's a money coach but in a spiritual way and the super interesting visualization she had us do. She said, just, you know, imagine how much money is transferring hands, is moving from one place to another right now, right in this moment around the globe.

Money is going back and forth and it's around and there's, it's everywhere. There's no shortage of money. The money's out there. We can attract it. So just that image of money flying everywhere has been, literally eye opening for me. So I, I know that I'm working through that. It's okay to charge for what I do.

I bring a lot of energy and a lot of value to what I do with my clients and in my programs and my circles. And it's okay to charge for that. I'm not gouging anybody. I'm just accepting an equal exchange of energy.

That is a lesson I'm really learning. And that is something that often, yeah, I'm getting goosebumps, which is my sign of truth. I've hit a truth that money issue for me is often at the root of my procrastination. I have great ideas. I have books I have written the first draft of and never finished. The process. I have books I have published and finished, but they were all under contract so it was easier to be motivated. But this idea that you know, that I have enough and I am very blessed. I have a beautiful home. We are very comfortable. We get to travel. We have nice things. We can, you know, we can eat organic food and it's not breaking the budget. It's at these days, it's kind of stretching it, but I have plenty.

But it's okay to want more. Imagine what if we could all say, I want more, I want more peace in the world. I want more joy in the world. I want more abundance in the world, and abundance can be anything: a lot of joy, a lot of, you know, a lot of happiness, a lot of laughter, an abundance of laughter. How cool would the world be if we all laughed a bit more or a lot more?

So that's something that I know is underlying my procrastination, and I am working on it, and I have been working on it, and I'm still working on it, I'm probably always going to work on it, because it's something that's been ingrained in me not just in, in my own mind. You know, personal lifetime and most of my childhood, but it's ancestral.

I mean, that sense of lack was, was real during the depression. And in the deep South, it was it lasted a lot longer than it did like in the, in the Northeast. And I have been steeped in the stories of how they would have watermelon for dinner in the summertime because they didn't have anything else to eat.

And my mother's family, at least, which is where that story's from, was pretty well off because my grandfather still had a job. And so there's that, those kinds of stories that are part of my DNA. And I have done some work around releasing that as well, but it's so strong in my, in my experience and in the energy that I was raised in that it's probably something I'm always going to have to work on. But I have identified it as part of why I procrastinate, because who am I to ask for more? So, there's that piece of it too. So, that's an emotional piece of the procrastination for me. And it's, it's really interesting for me to look at that and to examine it and to work on it consciously.

Because it is, it's insidious. It's very, very subconscious. And it was reinforced in lots of ways beyond money. But money is a good symbol for that piece of my own work that I still need to do.

So then I start to think, okay, so that's there. It's emotional. It's a belief. Beliefs are just things we keep telling ourselves until we believe them.

How can I shift that? How can I begin to shift that? And some of it is by working with other healers. I mean, I have been working on money issues for a number of years now. And I'm really, really good at manifesting money through other people. And, and for other people, but I'm not so good about manifesting it for me.

And that's where even, you know, that I say I want to participate. I want to contribute to the family money. That's that old, a little bit of that, you know, it's not okay if it's just for me, I can bring in money for the family, which I've done many times in many different ways. But what if I just brought it in for me?

Not in a greedy way, but in a, hmm, I wouldn't feel guilty about spending money on things for me if it's my money. You know, that kind of thing. And I'm still working through this, and I know some of my language is probably not really in alignment with where I'm going yet, but I'm working on it. I'm thinking about it.

And so some of the ways that I'm, I'm Shifting that, first of all, right here, I'm talking about it in a very public way, which is not something I typically would be comfortable doing, but I've gotten really comfortable talking to you and it's also for me, it's part of the way I shifted is through sharing it because that then helps to normalize things for me when I hear from other people that, Oh yeah, should I have the same experience? They're having the same issues. And which a lot of people do. And I'm in groups where that is this one that I was just in the webinar. We were talking about it and how all of us, except I think, I think there was one person that was like, yeah, money's great.

But a lot of us, and especially the older ones of us, I think, had these real blocks of our own lack and scarcity and worthiness. And so I get to talk to other people who have that and that helps to normalize the experience for me. I'm not weird. I'm not broken. It's just something about our culture that we grew up in and we can, we are now choosing to change our relationship with that concept of lack and scarcity and kind of let it go. Cause that's all in your brain. It's all in your brain.

There's money going around this globe right now all the time that the that visualize that's part part of why I liked that because it did really give me a visual of how there's really no lack of money in the world. The distribution of it is what the problem is.

So, so there's that there's also I know from doing energy work that when I get into that lack, scarcity, who am I to be worthy of receiving, you know, money or any other kind of abundance that's a very low vibration place to be. And part of why I wanted to jump on right now, right after I got out of that webinar is because I was feeling very high. My energy was really nice and light and very high vibration and it was around that, you know, this issue this underlying issue of my procrastination, which I only really figured out while I'm talking to you.

That's part of why I wanted to do this today because it's, it's a process and I'm just kind of walking you through the, my particular process around this particular issue. So that getting myself in that high vibration state is something that I need to remember whenever I'm creating something new that I will be charging for.

I don't want to layer in that oh, I'm not worthy of receiving your exchange, your energy exchange, for this amazing project that I'm creating. I want to infuse my offers, my programs, my circles with this delight. We get to come together and exchange energy in this amazing situation that I've created and I'm excited about it and I know it's going to change everybody in it. So I'm doing, you know, I've got this great idea, this great focus that I can bring to this work. And I know that it's going to lift everybody up. That's the energy I want to bring anytime now that I am procrastinating around that sense of unworthiness or that sense of who am I, that sense of, which I guess is also the unworthiness, that sense of anxiety, that emotion of anxiety that often gets triggered when I think about, you know, asking somebody for money, who am I to do that?

So that high vibe is what I wanted to bring. And I hope it's what I brought here during this conversation because that really is a place that I know how to get to now when I need to Sometimes I have to meditate. Sometimes I need to call a friend. Yeah. Sometimes I need to get out and walk in the woods.

Sometimes I need to just stop and play with my dog for a little while. She always makes me laugh. Laughter is a very high vibration activity and feeling. And so I know I have to consciously remember that when I'm going to start working with things that involve money and it's. It's not as true when I'm paying other people for their services.

I'm usually paying them for those services cause I know the value of their service and I want to, you know, have that energy exchange to bring the balance to it. But when I'm creating these new programs and when I'm bringing these new opportunities to work with other people online and in person, but when I'm bringing those into being.

I want to work from this place. I want to work from this. I'm so excited that I get to help other people do this and that this is the container for it. And that this is the energy exchange that I'm bringing to the party. And so that's a place where you can practice getting to and it does require a couple things.

I have to be aware that I'm not where I want to be. I have to feel that. And this morning I was having rollercoaster emotions. I was feeling great when I got up and then I saw something in the neighborhood that kind of, I got judgy about and it brought me way down. And then, and then my dog made me laugh and that brought me up and then something else happened and that brought me way down.

And literally I remember thinking, wow, I'm on a rollercoaster this morning. And so you have to recognize it. You have to be able to go, Oh, I'm in a not such good place right now. I feel heavy or, you know, my heart doesn't feel open. However you describe that feeling would be a really good thing to start to notice.

And for me, it's that procrastination is a big clue. It's like, Oh, okay. I have been procrastinating for a week now. I've been procrastinating looking into why I was procrastinating for a week now. And so that being observant of your own habits, your own feelings and internal feelings, and not just emotion, but the feelings in your body.

I had stuffy nose. I still do a little bit. So hopefully I'm going to clear up the rest of that in the next day or so. Just by focusing on now what I know that I need to bring myself into this place and to challenge the beliefs that I had had that I am moving away from, that I'm replacing with something more uplifting around lack, scarcity, anxiety, those things that I have attached to the idea of money.

And I'm just using the money as an example, because it's the one I'm dealing with today. It's the one I'm aware of this morning. But I also think it's something that is not unusual. And so you may share some of this stuff around money yourself, but it may also be, maybe you're procrastinating having a hard conversation with somebody.

Okay. I'm procrastinating. Why am I avoiding this? What's scary about it or what do I think is going to happen? And is that true? A lot of this, I just, I just got in the webinar, it's stuff I know, but it was reinforced in this webinar that I was just at. So that's the kind of thing where you can start is just to notice.

Notice how you're feeling. Notice, do I feel heavy? Do I feel light? Am I excited about something? Am I frustrated or fearful about something? When you can name it, you can do something about it.

And for me, naming the procrastination and then figuring out, digging in, figuring out, you know, is it, That I don't have the resources.

No, I have all the resources and the experience that I need. I can do this. It's a no brainer that I can do this and that I have everybody lined up that I need to, to help me get it launched from coaching to guests, to, you know, books and websites and other people's podcasts.

I have resources. That's not a problem. So the intellectual part of this process is good.

But emotionally I came up against that big boulder of money issue I'll call it and that was what was creating the procrastination So even though I knew I had everything I needed ,even though I was excited, I am excited, really excited about about this new direction I'm going in. Again not leaving behind anything I've done. I'm bringing all the healing work, the circles, everything, the podcast, everything's coming with me. We're just gonna focus it in and on something a little more specific than what I've been doing... and of course I lost my train of thought right there,... but by focusing in on procrastination and looking at what that boulder of money issues was, it's an old friend, it's been there a long time, it's time for it to go.

And so I know that for the next few days, and then probably the rest of my life, I'm going to be finding bits and pieces of that. Right now I've got a big block in the way and I have tools to move it. I have support to move it. So again, intellectually, I know what to do, but emotionally, it's a, it's a little you know, it's like, it's the devil, you know.

I know how to do that around money, but I have to learn, I want to learn, how to accept abundance. Even around money, knowing that it actually, as it flows to me, it's actually flowing through me to other people. It is flowing through the work that I do, the lives that I change, the transformation that I want to bring forth for the world.

And yes, I'm not overstating that. I want to start small and have that ripple out around the world to bring a new kind of leadership out into the world. Not to overthrow, but to find a balance point with the more masculine leadership structure and style. We need both. But I want to really focus on illuminating the leader within, and I'm starting with women.

I'm going to say it that way.

All right. I hope this makes sense. I know that sometimes I ramble and I just felt, I just felt for where I should go and procrastination was the topic of the day in my head. And so I hope maybe that there's something in there that illuminates something for you and helps you to go through that process of noticing, stepping back and examining what is it that is creating whatever it is you're avoiding, or you can use it for anything really.

I mean, if you're emotionally overwrought about something, take a breath. Ask why. Step back a little bit and do a little, you know, do I need support intellectually? Do I have the people and the money or the resources in place to deal with this? If not, how can I do that?

You know, you can do the intellectual thing, and then dig into the emotional thing, and then, how can the spiritual thing help? Right. And maybe it's at the spiritual level that you have a block. That's certainly been a long, a large part of my journey, but so there's these sort of three levels of looking at whatever it is you need to work on.

All right. I'm going to leave it there. I, again, I hope you've gotten something from this. I find I am really interested in helping people to move through the things that are blocking them from their own abundance, their own joy, their own happiness, their own health. That's my goal ,has been my goal since I, And by sharing my own story, I do that not from a place of ego, but from a place of sharing.

This is my experience. This is how I have moved through it. This is how my circles work is I, you know, this sharing thing and and hoping that some of that will resonate with you. Some of it may put things into context with you. Some of it may bring things to the surface that you haven't been aware of because you do stop and you tune in.

And so, I think all of these are very practical steps that you can take to help yourself understand what's keeping you from being the person you want to be with the life you want, with the work you want, with the friends and the joy that you want. So I've gotten here by getting curious. And of course, this is Curiously Wise, and I am so happy to be your host here.

And I do hope that you'll keep tuning in. I do want to ask you, if you like this podcast, if you would please subscribe, because that way you'll get notified as soon as any episode drops. And it also helps other people find Curiously Wise because it does do something magical to the so if you, if you do like this and you want to know about it sooner, as soon as things drop just please subscribe.

In the meantime, have a wonderful day and stay curious.