Taking Imperfect Action to Achieve Success

Taking Imperfect Action to Achieve Success with Raja Vaidya

Raja: [: 00:00:00

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: so, it's almost like the floor. Comes out from under your life and that's what it feels like cuz you're falling and there's no bottom. And but it's only when you do that, when you finally do that and other people can embrace the real you.

And I realized in the past year, wow. I think I've been trying to hide this for too long and trying to be ashamed of it now. I don't need to be,

Laurin: Hello friends. Welcome back to Curiously Wise's Practical Spirituality and Action.

u. From the fighting city of [: 00:01:00

Can't stand toe to toe with this guy. Ring the victory bell for the mindshift master who will make you believe it and become it. Raja Veia.

Raja: Hello, Laurin.

Laurin: Hello. Hello.

Raja: amazing intro. I

Laurin: That is a, I love it. I love anything that makes me laugh and smile. It's great. So that was fun.

Raja: Yeah, I

Laurin: We were talking about how you don't like to take yourself too seriously, and I think that's a perfect example of where we all take ourselves a little too seriously usually.

Raja: Certainly.

Laurin: So welcome, welcome, welcome.

I'm glad to have

Raja: thank you. Thank you. I'm, I'm, I'm glad to be here. To be here. Thanks for having me on your show, and thanks for being on my show.

You are a speaker, you are a [: 00:02:00

I've seen pictures of you. You're, you're a black belt, right?

Raja: I am, I am, I'm a I've been in martial arts now for 38 years. I'm a six degree master black belt. And I'm in the Blackboard Hall of Fame and I'm in a martial arts movie. And we also have a martial arts comic book called The Martialist that already has three issues, the only 500 prime copies ever made.

So very high quality. They're great collectors items. So, you know, I have a lot of irons, irons in the fire, and it's, it, it's just, it's just the older way I get the more I realize like, life has to be lived, you know? So I used to take myself way too seriously, like you said before, and now I take myself a lot less seriously, even though I'm even more serious than ever about creating the impact that I want.

But as I do that, along that journey, I realized just to let things go. If you like Elsa, let it go.

Laurin: I love that song.

Raja: Yeah,[: 00:03:00

Laurin: I will not try to sing it.

Raja: actually it's, it's good in my voice.

Laurin: yeah, it probably is. I have been told I can't carry a tune, so I, I don't sing except when I'm alone and then I sing a lot.

Raja: Yeah.

Laurin: So you have something you call the black belt Mind shift.

Raja: Yeah.

Laurin: so can we talk about that? Because I know my son did karate for a number of years and he really liked it and he was little, so I had to go and I had to like help him learn all the mindset stuff and that kind of thing.

So I know that there's a lot of this mindset that comes with martial arts that is I don't know, it's very centering. I would.

Raja: Mm-hmm.

Laurin: And I loved, I loved learning that with him because it was when I was very early on my journey to learning about my spirituality and that kind of thing.

So it's a nice overlap with where I am now. And you are a master, a grand, grand master, you said. So

Raja: Lost.[: 00:04:00

Laurin: talk about that black belt mind shift.

Raja: Alright, well I, I, I recall way back long ago, it's been over 38 years ago. Oh wait, actually now, now it's 39 years that I've been doing martial arts and and I don't mean just doing as in like kind of casually go to class and do something. I've been. I've been at the upper echelons. I, I used to train six days a week, four or five hours a day.

I trained at 16 years old. I went and competed in, in the world championships and I placed and then and then I was 18. I went again and, and placed again. And I also qualified for the Olympic team. And at that time also, I also, during all this time, I had a, had a very severe stutter that I had to had to overcome and, and work through.

and rise. And that's really. [: 00:05:00

I'm gonna lift 150 just cause I say so. And you know, we kind of have to have that tongue and cheek attitude and just say, you know what, who cares if anybody like that doesn't. But martial arts I love because it's, it truly has changed my life for the better. And in, in the beginning, you know, it, it was just surviving, just trying to get through it.

Just trying to stand up to, to the bullies by being so good that people started to take notice. I remember I, I did a demonstration. My karate school came to my high school and we did a demonstration in front of the entire at that time was the ninth and 10th grades. And all of a sudden people noticed like uhoh, oh damn, Roger got good, better, better stop, better stop making fun of 'em.

's, as soon as I did that, I [: 00:06:00

Physical talents. And, and, and like I, I, I was born in, born in India and came to America and I was very small and, you know, so we didn't for most of my life I was vegetarian. So w we didn't have a lot of protein. I didn't, I was very, very skinny when I was younger and very hard to put on weight and, and, you know, everybody just seemed to be bigger than me.

e way that you react to them [: 00:07:00

I was so focused on that, that I also disconnected from a lot of other things too. So I realized that this is not something that only happens to me, but it also happens to a lot of other people, especially when they're training. So I decided to, to pay attention to that. So I started to pay attention to the human.

Training

tern I saw of students going [: 00:08:00

Not just what you think, but changes how you.

Laurin: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. It's amazing how when we can shift our perspective, we can really change our, our interaction with the world. But it changes the world around us too. It's pretty remarkable and powerful. And so it's lovely that, you know, this is one way that you can get there. You can learn that.

you use this to break out of your bullying, to, to break out of your, your shell. You've, you said and one point earlier, and so now you bring that into your coaching. Right.

Raja: Yeah. , one of my main keynote talks, I, I, I give, that's called the Five Steps to Black Belt, confidence to Prophets.

Laurin: Hmm.

Raja: Because I [: 00:09:00

And for a while, sometimes we get stuck in a grind. We get stuck in a run. We get used to that. We, we get placated and we get loaded in, into that false sense of like, well, I'm doing things. I'm so busy. That's great. You're very productive. Are you are, you're very active, but you're not, but you're not productive.

So one of the things we start to talk about is, is about where you focused. And one of the training segments I talk about in my mind shift module is I talk about the idea that, you know, are you achievement oriented or are you progress oriented? Because if you focus on the process versus the achievement, you're actually going to approve a.

milestone. If only I reached [: 00:10:00

And for that I say you just haven't planned for it, right? Because we can all wish for things. I wish I had a million dollars. I wish I could lose 50 pounds. I wish my kids paid attention to me or respecting me, or I'm, or I'm single and lonely. I wish I could find like the love of my life. That's great.

hat people are attracted to, [: 00:11:00

Like in the past year, my, my life is completely transformed again because I just went through a whole big pivot myself. I. I, I was just doing a once a week interviews trainings for my clients. And I was getting a little bit, , complacent, like, what more could I do?

And I started thinking it, it's gotta be something else I can do to kind of be an example to them and show what I can do and show how my process works. So back in August, I decided, you know what, there are people charging $10,000 to get on a thing, get on a hundred stages in a year. I think I can do that in half the. You know me a block belt, I just think, I just do the math. Why is it doing two half an hour shows in a week so hard? Just two, four. Okay. Half an hour shows that's two hours of time technically. Right. So I started that journey and unfortunately I didn't get 106 months. I got 204 in five months,

Laurin: Oh gosh.

interviews in five months.[: 00:12:00

And, lemme tell you, I did not know what I was doing.

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: But here's the thing, imperfect action beats perfect planning every time.

Laurin: Yep.

Raja: I just went ahead and I took that leap of faith and I, I think it was Steve Harvey that said that sometimes when you take that leap of faith, that leap means you're flying through the air.

You don't know where you're gonna land.

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: So you gotta get comfortable being uncomfortable. And when you understand that, you realize that. growth Even though it's uncomfortable, if you understand that that's going to happen and that you make that part of your plan and part of your process of continual growth, then it's gonna be normal.

eve it. , and I told people, [: 00:13:00

And I flipped the script on it again to say, you know what? This is not only for me, how can I help the guests that are coming on the show? And as soon as I started doing that, all of a sudden everything changed. So, once again, when you give, when you give, That's when you get in return. Cause a lot of people think that, you know, a respect is, is taken.

No it's not. Respect is earned. Right? And, and the interest is due before you get it. So it's sort of like a backwards loan, right? You pay the interest ahead of time and then you get the respect. And whatever hard work and effort that you put in, you get that back more than twice, more than 10 times because.

continual incremental growth [: 00:14:00

Plenty of people told me nah, that's crazy. You're not gonna do this. Why would you do this? Why? Why are you spending so much time doing this? You know? Would you have anything better to do? You know what? I created a system that I learned to monetize and now I can train others with. And then now that became the basis of what I was doing.

And you just saw my show and you, and you saw how much fun it was

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. Yeah.

Raja: and that, and that whole system now is not by accident. It's strategic in the way that I designed it. Because being a black belt and being a scientist, you know, I've written protocols for multi million. Clinical trials and I've actually been one of the key drivers for one of our mostly billion dollar drugs.

dollars by now. I think. So, [: 00:15:00

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: and they, they think they can get away with it

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: and you can't, you know, eventually people find out what kind of person you are and how you treat others and you know, that's not something that you'll want to do.

That's not the kind of person you want to be. So I always tell people here that this is your opportunity to be great, to be amazing, to be an amazing human that uplifts others. And if you can do that,

Laurin: boy, do we need that in the world. Right? We need everybody to up be uplifting.

Raja: And if all of you are, guess what? You're gonna bring me the victory

ll. I am a master of getting [: 00:16:00

That's how I started the podcast. I was like, I got really interested in it. I happened to be working with a coach who was just doing a beta of a, how do you be a guest on a podcast class?

Raja: Mm-hmm.

Laurin: I took that and I was like, I, I wanna be a guest, but it looks like I could invite whoever I want to if I ended up doing my own podcast.

And so I, you know, I used what she taught me about being a guest, and I filled in the gaps with my children who are millennials and no technology. And my son had actually had a podcast for a while, and so it was like, all right, come tell me what I need to know. Tell me what I need to get, and then, So then it has been one of the most fun things I have ever done.

Raja: Yes. That's what's surprising. I never thought doing a livestream or podcast would be this much fun. I would've done it 20 years ago.

Laurin: Exactly. Exactly.

new friends, met so many new [: 00:17:00

And, you know, and, , in the end, no matter how much income you get, you also wanna understand that the income is a vehicle to get to where you really want to get to. But money's not the.

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: Money's, money's the tool that gets you to the answer.

Laurin: right.

Raja: a lot of people have their eyes on the wrong target. Now, none of that, most people have their targets set way too low. Like Les Brown says that you know, the problem with most people is that not that they aim high and miss, it's that they aim low and they hit people's, people's goals and dreams are too small. So what I started to do last year is just dream big.

st being very plain and very [: 00:18:00

And which, which means that every single, one of you out there hearing me and saying, oh my God, this guy still this, this guy still, still can't talk. Right. You're right. You know? And that's me. Sorry, not sorry. You know, and, and, and, and you can't be ashamed of anything that makes you, you.

Cause like every single imperfection you have is what makes you beautiful. That's the, that's the beauty of humanity. That's the, that's that celebration of humanity that we need to. Have is that like we are all so different and, and it's all of our differences together.

Like a puzzle, you know, make the whole, and you can't have a puzzle with all the same size piece. They gotta be different sizes, they gotta fit different places. And we all have different skills and different strengths. And I used to think growing up, man, if I just get straight A's, I'll get a scholarship.

ion, right? I, because I did [: 00:19:00

Cuz if you believe in yourself, if you like who you are first. Because I used to be ashamed of myself. You know, think that this is my fault. I don't wanna embarrass anybody. I, I, I, I don't wanna embarrass myself. Used to be afraid to I, I used to talk as little as possible so people wouldn't find out like, oh, that guy.

No, no, no, I don't, you know? Cause you, you stand in a group of a couple of new people and all of a sudden, you know, two, three people kind of look sideway, they look up on, they're trying to get outta the conversation cuz they don't want to stand there. Listen to you cuz they're, they're trying to be polite and you know, that's a shame.

just, just, just, just walk [: 00:20:00

Laurin: Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Raja: I got more than enough and, and you know, truly, like, I'm blessed now and the more that I talk about this and share about it, the easier it gets because Sense of, you know, we all have something that we're a little bit insecure about.

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: And I think when I started talking about my insecurity and started sharing it with the group, it started with speakers, Playhouse started with many other networking groups that I was part of. And as soon as they started talking about it and sharing with it, people started to understand it. They're like, oh, wow.

ndous energy and you're just [: 00:21:00

ruggles of people who have, who have a speech chain. And, and one of the things I found out at, at my last company I just worked at, I've been in cancer research for the past 25 plus years for the past 11 years with Johnson and Johnson. And one thing I realized in the past couple of years, even though there were other coworkers who made fun of my handicap behind my back, or even at one coworker who really just sort of that went off on me, yelled at me, attacked me because she thought she could, cuz I was in shock, I couldn't say anything. So she took advantage of [00:22:00] that.

Laurin: Damn

Raja: but in the, but in the ada, in the, in the, like, Americans with a Disability Act, there's federal protections for people with visual impairment with hearing impairment, not for people with speech handicaps.

Laurin: really.

Raja: Yeah, I think they have something for if you're mute, but if you have a, if you have a, if you have a start or a speech chain, speech is fluency, they don't have it in there.

Laurin: Damn.

Raja: don't know if they have to category. So one of my, once I discovered that one of my missions now is to talk to people in the government, in the, in the local registration, I want to change policy and make people like me who have a lot of gifts to give and are being silenced by other. By close-minded people, not by stupid people or mean people, but by close-minded people and make them understand that everybody has a value.

s when you uplift all of us. [: 00:23:00

Laurin: Nice, nice. I love that.

Raja: Yeah.

Laurin: Thank you for sharing that with us. I, I am a strong believer that we all have these stories that we've hidden or we've, you know, kept quiet about. Because we were either ashamed or we were afraid of revealing it, but letting it out. And I've done this in the last six or eight years myself, sharing those stories, allowing yourself to be vulnerable turns out to be a superpower because it gives other people permission to be vulnerable too.

lly tell your story cuz it's [: 00:24:00

Cuz Gary.

Raja: thing in the world. It really is to really share what you think is your weakness. It, it's so scary

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: so, it's almost like the floor. Comes out from under your life and that's what it feels like cuz you're falling and there's no bottom. And but it's only when you do that, when you finally do that and other people can embrace the real you.

And I realized in the past year, wow. I think I've been trying to hide this for too long and trying to be ashamed of it now. I don't need to be,

Laurin: Yeah. No. Embrace it. Embrace it. Yeah. Yeah. I think that brings us to a good stopping place in this conversation. This is, this took, took us places as I didn't expect, and it's really been wonderful, wonderful conversation.

Raja: Thank

ng everybody this season, if [: 00:25:00

Raja: Oh yeah, absolutely. Probably a few years ago when I was trying to, so in 2015, I was in a head on car crash and. My head smashed the windshield and took a chunk of my hair with it and I glassed my head for six months and one eye was tracking slower than the other one For a year I was, had I, so I must had a concussion too, cause I was also slurring my words even worse.

ot displacing responsibility [: 00:26:00

What they do now is Jocko and Leaf. They, they go to businesses now and they teach extreme ownership to to, to the managers of companies. And so when, so, so, so when the managers come and they tell them, well, we had a bad quarter. My team is terrible. They didn't hit their timelines, what they tell them and which I love, cause me on black belt, and this is what I teach my students too.

Well, that's your fault. It's not your team's fault, it's your. And they don't. And, and then the managers don't like hearing that

Laurin: No.

Raja: cuz they've never been told that. And that's one big flaw I see with every corporate structure is you do not get evaluated by the people who, who directly report to you. They turn a blind eye of that.

ou who you actually. Have an [: 00:27:00

Don't you think those people have some feedback they want to say they're keeping a lot in? Am you not accepting that, you know, you're not taking ownership of your own, of your own behaviors, your own talents, and also your own potential. So as soon as I started to take extreme ownership of what I was. finally felt control of my life

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: control of myself.

And as soon as something happened, I said, you know what? There's a portion I can control. I can't control everything that happens around me, but I can. I can, but I can control how I face it and I can control my response to it.

Laurin: Yes.

Raja: And now you start thinking ahead and start planning. Now you become proactive rather than reactive.

rything around you. Now you, [: 00:28:00

But it's also the story of overcoming your fears, overcoming your insecurities, overcoming who you're supposed to be. You, you as a version 2.0. I call it u2. And when you become the next version of you, that evolution sometimes happens with the one decision because you make a decision. That's the start of everything.

Cause almost everybody can think of a time point in their life where they say, you know what? I made this choice and everything change. I decided to, I, I, I said yes to that proposal. All right? And then we got married and my life was completely. Different after that I said yes to that job offer that I didn't think I was gonna get on the other side of the country.

anged everything. I said you [: 00:29:00

When you stop blaming others, see blame allows others to take control of your life.

Laurin: Yep.

Raja: There's a second book I would even add that Victor Frankls Hal Mank, and it's Victor Franco. He was a psychiatrist and he lived through the oc. And it tells a story about being in the, in the, in the death camps and how he survived and how he separated his mind from what was happening there.

r perception of what happens [: 00:30:00

Laurin: Mm-hmm.

Raja: And his way of doing that is, that's what helped him survive that. Probably one of the worst ordeals any human can go through.

Laurin: Yeah.

Raja: And I, I don't even wanna think about it. And we have so much proof that shows that stuff is real and that, you know, it boggles me that there are some people in the world that don't believe it. That's okay. That's not a political,

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah,

Raja: but, you know, just you know, do your own reading. You know, don't let the media think for you,

Laurin: Yes. Always. Yeah. Yeah. You're responsible for yourself and and informing yourself responsibly.

Raja: Mm-hmm. For sure.

Laurin: Well, I wanna thank you for being here today. This was a great conversation. I have enjoyed getting to know you over these last couple of weeks as we've been talking with each other. And can you let the listeners know where they can find you?

behind me you'll see victory [: 00:31:00

It gives you five modules. There are maybe three minutes each. So in, in about a 15 amendment to minutes, I give you five fast strategies to start changing your life in the areas of health, wealth, mindset, faith and family, and together like arising. That's gonna raise all the ships in your life. That's sort of the theme as you, as you can surmise that I'm going with, is that, know, it's not just one thing, but it's, it's the balance of those things that is going to really help to change you and to move you forward into you 2.0.

, for being one to help lift [: 00:32:00

Raja: Oh, like I always say, you know, there's too many people I've seen online, like, like the fake gurus and you can tell, you know, all the flash in the pan gurus that have been there for a year and 18 months and they take people's money and then they're gone. But you know, I live by my black belt creed, truly.

You know, and I talk about this all the time, like integrity, loyalty, and honor. And for those that, that align with me, I won't ever cheat anybody. I, my, my goal is tough love. I want you to win and I want me to win. So I wanna find a way for us to win together. And, you know, and, and, and I just came up with my, my real guiding model for, for my business is that, you know, don't fake it till you make it.

Instead believe it and become it. Cuz every champion out there was a champion in their own mind first before everybody else saw it and believed it.

e me when I first started my [: 00:33:00

Raja: Good. That's beautiful. That's exactly what I'm talking

Laurin: every day.

Raja: Yeah. There's a variety of Say it. That's just my way of saying it. But do what works for you and, and, and. You know, I, and, and there's so many amazing people out there, you know, go, go find them and go connect with them. And the more people that you connect with, the more you're going to realize how, what amazing life you have and how much amazing people with, with great talents are out there all around you.

Laurin: Yeah, yeah. That's one thing I've definitely learned over the last year as I've been doing this. It's just like, wow, there's so many interesting people out there doing great things.

Raja: It's amazing. Like the, the, it's, it's just amazing, like how many people are out there, so, but

s been really lovely to talk [: 00:34:00

Raja: Thank you so much and I hope everybody out there got a new black belt and my mind shift. From this interview, thank

Laurin: I, I hope so too. I hope so too. And I wanna thank the listeners for being here with us today, and that you'll go check out Raja's website and get his free course and watch some of his videos cuz he's a great speaker. In the meantime, I hope you have a wonderful day, and I hope you'll come back next week for another episode of Curiously Wise, practical Spirituality and Action.

And don't forget, stay curious.

if you had any ahas, please [: 00:35:00

Please head over to my website. www.heartlightjoy.com. Curiously wise is a team effort. I am grateful for the skill and enthusiasm. Arlene men brought our producer and Sam Wittig. Our audio engineer bring to this collaboration. Our music is where the light is by lemon music studio.

I'm Laurin Wittig. Please join me again next week. For another episode of curiously wise, eyes from my heart to yours, may your life be filled with love, light joy, and of course, curiosity.