Unlocking the Seven Superpowers of Families with Dr. Kelly Bohnhoff

Interview Episode with Dr. Kelly Bohnhoff

Kelly: [: 00:00:00

I choose and to own that as much as I could. That's all the heavy energy, it's all the shadows and it's all the light. We're here to dance. All the way through everything, and to do that. With love, self, love, self, compassion, self forgiveness. Self trust and self care,

our host, Laurin Wittig. And [: 00:01:00

With a history of childhood adversity and sex trafficking, coupled with over 35 years of expertise as a registered nurse, licensed marriage and family therapist, and co founder of Josephine's Clinic, a nonprofit serving those who have experienced human trafficking and violence. She unveils her own spiritual awakening in her new book, What's Going On With My Family?

A Roadmap to Healing Trauma, Unlocking Your Hidden Power, and Remembering What Is Sacred. Welcome to the podcast, Kelly.

Kelly: Thank you, Laurin. I'm so happy to be here.

I have, I have family trauma [: 00:02:00

over the last 40 years. So it's it's familiar territory to me, but I'm, I'm really, I know there's going to be people out there who this will be new to, or there'll be somewhere in the midst of it. And it's really helps to have someone guide you through it. Or in this case, you through your book to guide you through it.

So, you know, that you're not alone in this process. You're not stuck in, you know, it's not that you get stuck and you're not at the end of it yet. You just have the process and you got to go through it. So I really appreciate you writing this book for those like me, who were really in need of, and I was lucky enough to find what I needed at the time, but a guide through that, that really transformative process. Tell us a little bit about what your journey has been.

Kelly: Right. So my [: 00:03:00

And of course, this is. Ancient ancestral trauma that we, we dove into, but we did it with intention and purpose, but we also had to kind of pay for admission to the journey, which was the amnesia that all of us felt together. So, I had 3 opportunities as a little girl to explore what it means to be human.

ind of the spider sense, the [: 00:04:00

And that was something, of course, that Put my snorkel even deeper underwater, those heavy energies were very different than what I was already trying to navigate. And through that process, as I got a little bit older, I became a nurse. I became a trauma therapist because I had just 1 question when I was a little girl.

And it was, why are children being hurt? By those who have an opportunity to keep them safe. And so I was always curious about, well, what, where is the answer to that? Because. This can't be all there is, but over time, as I went into my 20s and I got married and I started a career and we got a house and we had 2 children.

[: 00:05:00

I had taken on the unlovable. Unworthy and not enough, I thought in serving in service to others as a wounded healer would be enough. For this lifetime, but it wasn't until the pandemic. And the pause there, which is possibility of aligning to universal source energy. Came full stop essential worker. I was no longer able to get to the children to the teams and to the families and it broke my spirit not to be able to be in that role.

aled the ancestral trauma or [: 00:06:00

I tried acupuncture and in that 1st acupuncture, they put over 100 pins in my body. I was so sick. And it opened every Meridian in my body. Now, I did not know I was energy. And I did not know I was spirit, so you can imagine my surprise. At the toxins, not just energy that shifted, but the toxins in my body that flooded and in the next 12 days, I really thought I was taking the exit.

Laurin: Wow.

ng. And I had to figure that [: 00:07:00

So I call myself a recovering caterpillar and I've been in the chrysalis energy. And now I'm completely healed, no prescriptions, no pain, no coping, no addictions, and the book was born from that process and on the other side of awareness, where we had planned, my family and I had planned this whole beautiful journey to give me the possibility of transforming fear.

t is how the book came to be,[: 00:08:00

Laurin: are places there that parallel my my path. The transforming fear to freedom was a truly life changing moment for me working with a healer and and because like you I was hyper vigilant. I was always. It's scanning the room, who's about to go, who, who do I need to keep happy? So they don't pop off with my parents were loud and it was more emotional than anything else.

But I've, I had a session and I've told the story on my podcast plenty of times, but I had a session with this healer and I went in without really telling her what I needed just to kind of see what would happen. And, and she began by asking me what I believed and I told her. I couldn't answer that properly.

didn't interpret it as fear. [: 00:09:00

And so the allergies in the, in the energetic healing work, of course, allergies are all about fear because they keep you contained. So I had a very, you know, a very powerful experience in that hour on that lady's table. It was quick because I had been doing work beforehand. You know, I had been on the journey, but in that hour, things shifted so massively because of changing fear into freedom. And, and it takes a while to integrate it. And to really understand the difference between what can be and what was because for me, I'd lived in it for over 40 years, you know, so so it's, it's, I love that. You bring that up is taking that fear and turning it into freedom. I think we have so much fear in the world right now and people are just trying to [00:10:00] cope. we need to help them shift that into that freedom place, that place of knowing that you're a spirit.

Kelly: Yeah, you know, fear is just familiar energy aligned with resistance.

Laurin: Mm.

Kelly: So, as I began to understand more about who I truly was, so the know thyself, so one of the very first questions I did ask was, what do I believe? Because, remember that when our parents conceive, we actually have the genetic and energetic imprint.

Laurin: Mm.

Kelly: as we are in the womb, we've got everything going on with what's going on with mom, right? So my mom was really distressed while I was cooking. Then I came out into the world, so in those first seven years, we are entranced. So, based upon our brain and its development, you know, all of our babies are, you know, being saturated with information and kind of a hypnotic way.

So now we're, we're [: 00:11:00

What we're doing in the world right now is we're. honoring the energy aligned with love. We're healing. The world is not going to heck in a handbasket. You have to see it to heal it. And so what's happening is our families are brave, beautiful, and brilliant souls. Think of them as the Navy SEALs of the cosmos. We can men in every constellation, combination, and configuration we can think of at this point in time in the now. To build the bridge into the ascension into the evolution of consciousness. So we're just not [00:12:00] any old family coming in here. We said we are going to lift the vibration. We're going to shift by healing.

So I call shift the sacred healing of individual and family trauma. So it's a shift show out there, Laurin. We're shifting everything. It's a shift show, my friend, and the minute, the minute that I owned my shift, the sacred healing of individual and family trauma, then now everything began that the veil of forgetfulness, the amnesia, the world, the higher vibrational world of beauty and joy and freedom.

nite intelligence. Pure love [: 00:13:00

Exploring the emotions of pain, survival and suffering. Then every thought I had, every word I say, every belief I held, every emotion I felt and every action I thought would have been in alignment with that belief. But I didn't jump into that timeline. I jumped into the timeline with my family. We said in this lineage.

Here's what we're healing. Here's, we're going to give ourselves the opportunity to heal the possibility of healing. And so now, as I look to my, my mother has transitioned to the other side, my brother transitioned to the other side. I believe we, we are born and then we're born. We're born and then we're born born reborn.

at energetic perspective, to [: 00:14:00

I'm just part of the stage crew. Right.

Laurin: Mm.

Kelly: helping everybody, you know, figure some things out. And so once I was able to

Laurin: hmm.

Kelly: do this great reframe of what family trauma actually is, what it, what, what is it? What is it? Well, it's been so disempowering in its narrative. That I realized the true narrative was so empowering.

That it was almost hard to believe. However, what I realized now is, oh, it's super true for me. And I just wanted now that I'm free. I just wanted other people to have a roadmap through the hero's journey. Thank you. Joseph Campbell. And I designed it for traumatized families specifically. So it's through the lens of traumatized families and spirituality.

ifferent way in paradigm. So [: 00:15:00

Laurin: hmm. Mm

Kelly: This is the new family paradigm. One that is empowered. Should you choose to turn in that direction?

Laurin: hmm. Awesome. Yeah. I know that so many of us who are healers of whatever variety and, and I include nurses in there. I think nurses are amazing healers. They do. They're frontline people, you know but so many of us brought in so much, so much Old baggage, I would say of our, our ancestral line, even, you know, not just the lifetimes I've lived, but the ancestral line.

ple that I work with. Who I, [: 00:16:00

Right?

Kelly: Most of us do it. Most of us came to do this exact thing, right?

Laurin: And I've, I watched my dad break the pattern in his family and and I helped to do that. I, you know, I was a catalyst because I, I was the one who got off. You, you talk about. In your book, the merry ground, merry go round of survival. And the group that I found was specifically for, I was in college, so it was for students who had parents who are family members who are alcoholics.

And there we called it the merry go round of denial because in alcohol, in addiction, denial is a big thing, but it's basically the same thing. But I was the one that got off the merry go round and started saying the emperor has no clothes. Everything started to change. In that moment when I, when I was able to say that first to my mother, kind of practice

ad's an alcoholic and I, you [: 00:17:00

And I was so proud of him for breaking that pattern, you know?

Kelly: Yeah, I think, I think it's courage in the end. When you look at the Hawking scale of consciousness and in my own personal experience, Right there in the center of that scale is courage, and I believe that it takes tremendous courage to turn in the direction of the unknown and the unfamiliar and the uncertain.

now? And now we, we haven't [: 00:18:00

Well, I'm just holding joy and unconditional love and acceptance of all that is as it is. Because everybody is here that are meant to be. And I love that. I loved learning for myself. I wasn't here to fix, change, or save anyone.

Laurin: Mm-Hmm.

Kelly: Whoa, what now? Woo! That freed me up just right there. I mean, I'm like, oh, I misunderstood.

I misunderstood that. So, once I let go and understood why, just by being on the earth. And breathing as a sacred being sacred, meaning worthy of unconditional love, devotion, and reverence. We have served the purpose already by just being here. Now, if you want to find your joy, dance in your joy, right?

That's great. [: 00:19:00

But then now, when you think of 6 people in my own family that has our own genius. Were we to all be awake and aware at the same time, and we knew what our genius was, and we could live authentically together. Well, now we harness the genius of the 6. And so it's that hidden power. So within every traumatized family.

he pivotal aha moment that I [: 00:20:00

Laurin: Mm-Hmm.

Kelly: and so. That really helped me understand that. I was able to be a guide to help families transform fear. For To freedom. And once you're free, you've unlocked your power, remembered your sacred nature, and now you're co creating in what is referred to as dharma rather than karma.

Right? So now, everything is on the table and it's beautiful to see.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah, it is. So did you have people along the way, along your journey that, that sort of helped to guide you? You know, I think of them as earth angels, , you know, who show up when you need guidance or, or just support

've discovered so far, and I [: 00:21:00

But this sparkle is Dr. Kelly during the events that. Unfolded in this lifetime and in past lifetimes, or in, you know, it's all happening at once, but we'll call them pass

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-Hmm.

Kelly: When the trauma occurred, so this wasn't my first trafficking experience. I was healing another trafficking experience that I had had that I had forgotten that I have.

But when a sparkle has a trauma, it fractures that facet can can be lost or kind of. I think of it as just, we dropped that particular sparklet off. In another realm to be taken care of, so I had what is referred to as soul loss.

Laurin: Mhm.

Kelly: Now, [: 00:22:00

Not fully, I couldn't enter the astral plane. So, someone said, well, so loss can be healed through a shaman. And I said, what do you mean? I live in Ohio. I'm not going to find a shaman. What do you mean? And so I sat, I sat in a park and I, and I had learned by then because I had moved into dissociation so early in my life, I couldn't feel my body.

nutes of my home and I went, [: 00:23:00

I know. And I went to her. For the initial session, and it was very uncomfortable and I had no idea what was happening, but I didn't care because I was trying to trust the process and we were able to retrieve. 3 facets. That we're ready to come back. She was the 1st guide on the side that really took out took me outside of my scientific mind.

I'm a scientist by training. An academician by training, and so I had to just really wrestle more with her. And just trust it was happening within 1 year at a follow up later, and she showed me how to bring the rest of those facets back. Slowly within 1 year, I had been able to restore my blueprint. And to restore my.

er. It was a nutritionist, a [: 00:24:00

The guides on the side and take myself out for a spin. And see if I could retain my own sovereignty. And my own light, my own glow and so that's what I'm practicing. But I would like to say that. I am creating the heaven on earth that I had always dreamed of. I do live in that reality now. And it's a beautiful place to be truly.

of my favorite things to do [: 00:25:00

Let me find another way to work with energy in another way. But the shamanic is just, it sings to my heart because it's so ancient. It's been part of the evolution of, of people the whole way through, I believe. And so it's, it's very powerful. So I'm glad that you allowed the universe to bring that to you.

Kelly: Yeah, and to step into the unknown, the unprepared and the uncertain, because as a scientist, my logical mind was, this is a bunch of bunch of belief system or B. S. right? This is a bunch of B. S. and I realized, oh, belief system belief systems. Pretty important, so navigating that and rewiring. My beautiful brain.

as taken time and will take. [: 00:26:00

Laurin: I, I like to say I'm a work in progress and I always will be, it's just, yeah. So I, I love, I I've, I've jotted down a few of your sayings there cause I just, I love especially it's a shift show.

So let me, let me just look at my questions here. So when you wrote the book. Because you are so deeply into the spiritual now, but you also have the logical mind. Did you write this with spirit flowing through or was it a logical thing or did you meld the two, which I think is what a lot of us do. how did you do that?

Mm.

h me blah, blah, blah. So it [: 00:27:00

For instance, I started eating with my left hand. And I'm growing my hair out, you know, I speak in ways that. In acronyms, for instance, like, it's like, it's a shift show out there. Like, who comes up with that? Where did that come from? So, what I learned what I've learned over the last 3 and a half years is to.

my logical mind, my academic [: 00:28:00

And so, in the end, it was the balance between the masculine and the feminine energy in balance. And that was new because I had been in recovering workaholism. So, how, how do you, how did I go from to do list to Dallas? Right, how did I keep it in a creative flow rather than feeling like I had to hammer out a bunch of stuff today.

Right? So, it was a process, but that, but in the end, I realized. We'll call it channeling I wish I have channeled this information. And I continue to channel the information. In all creative outlets, I just finished 10 guided meditations for families. Now guided meditation for an entire family, like where, where, who's got that?

is point, but, but I believe [: 00:29:00

Laurin: did you first realize that you had help on the other side, you know, a guide?

Kelly: It was when I, I worked with the Akashic Record Reader. She asked if I knew who my guides were and you have to remember that I didn't understand what she was saying. So Laurin, do you remember the show? Let's make a deal. Remember that show

Laurin: Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Mm

Kelly: to answer the question from my childhood, I went through curtain number 1 with the psychology background, the mind.

, the [: 00:30:00

And I said, well, anything's possible, right? So, she asked me, do you know who your guides are? And I said, I don't know what you're saying. I don't, what do you mean? So she taught me and helped me understand, and then she introduced me to my guides. And then I took it from there to develop that relationship.

n. So it's been a good time, [: 00:31:00

And so I just built, we are unique and universal expression of love. So there isn't anybody in this universe that's going to have my same path or the way that I approach it. But that's the fun part. We get to build it ourselves.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's I love, I love to work with my guides and I love their sense of humor because there's most of them have a very sharp wit. I have a couple who are a little more solemn, but but it's. It's a reminder to me that laughter and joy, you know, that, that lifting up literally of your energy when somebody is laughing near you or makes you laugh.

That's what [: 00:32:00

I worked with a lot when I was first starting out and over time, you know, they, they've kind of drifted away and new ones have come in. And as I raise my vibration and as I go along my journey, the guy comes in that I need in that moment. So it's

Kelly: That's right.

Laurin: yeah, but how much fun is it when you have, when you know that you have your guides and you have a relationship with them?

en to help source things for [: 00:33:00

It wasn't like she was exclusive to my friend. And so I regularly call upon her. Her name is Sorail. I offer her to anybody who wants to play with her. And I will periodically say, Sorail, I really need this. And I don't like to clothes shop. So it's usually something clothing wise. And then I just say, you know, when, if, if, and when you find it, let me know.

And sometimes it's immediate. I know where I need to go to get that thing. And sometimes it's three months later because it's something weird, you know, but it works every single time. And it gives me such joy because I don't have to do the hard work and she loves it. She, that's what she likes to do. So she's, she's my shopper helper.

y've had the same validation [: 00:34:00

Kelly: Yeah, I think yeah, it's as children see, you know, playing, being playful. This is the new opportunity. So it was as if I'm living 2 lives in 1 lifetime. So this playfulness or what does love feel like to me? What does joy feel like? Can I trust it? I didn't even know what joy felt like. And it wasn't until I created my own butterflies from I got 1 of those kits, like, 10 year olds get to to make caterpillars into butterflies.

was rushing in energy and I [: 00:35:00

So I talk about levels of consciousness as heavy energies or light energies. I notice people get. Entangled in the polarity language, it's right or wrong. It's positive or negative. It's toxic or tonic. It's dysfunctional. [00:36:00] I move away from. From that language, because it's a heavy language. I choose to use light.

Lighter language or empowered language. So, for anyone who's struggling with, well, what is joy even look like, or feel like. One of the things that broke this open for me was I got bubbles and I started blowing bubbles, or I kept replaying the giggle of a baby, the giggle of a baby, or small farm animals, little baby animals.

There was something about, so, a song, a painting, some music, just hunt for the joy. It's there. Just, just look for it. You are joy, actually, innately. So,

tle, a little heavier energy [: 00:37:00

Oh, look, I see I'm getting the thumbs up there. The baby's doing funny things or the, you know, the kittens or the puppies or, you know, whatever. And I find myself laughing out loud. And I feel better. I just feel lighter. And I, I like your language of lighter and heavier because that's how I experience it.

When I'm feeling a little down, it, it, I, my body feels heavier. And when I feel light, I get, I get a little giddy and I, and I sit up straighter and I, you know, it's, it's, and I feel better. And for me, that was a big one is moving out of despair and anxiety and fear and hyper vigilance and into this lovely, you know, I'm right where I need to be.

flow. And it's just so much, [: 00:38:00

I don't hear my guides as easily those, you know, those kinds of things. And when I can be in that higher vibration, that lighter energy, I'm just connected to everything. Just walking in the woods is joyful.

Kelly: right.

Laurin: And I literally walk by go, Hey, how y'all doing to the trees or a beautiful bird or a butterfly will go, thank you so much.

That was gorgeous. You know, I've just constantly grateful when I'm living in that higher vibration and boy, what a nicer place that is to live. So yeah, it's this, this very powerful

old that within the midst of [: 00:39:00

We said, Hey, we're going to grow. Like, we're going to grow like crazy in this environment because this is not my first rodeo. It's not your first rodeo. We have learned, we have grown and we have said the higher consciousness of humanity has said, we've learned as much as we can. From the pain struggle, suffering and survival, and can you raise your hand and say, I am if you're ready to move into building and co, creating the world, we want to truly.

es remember and unlock their [: 00:41:00

Laurin: Coming in

Kelly: They are alert and they are oriented.

And so I consider my granddaughters, my next teachers, and so we were just over this weekend. I asked them to color. Anything that was on their mind, because I'm so fascinated by what's in their minds in their hearts in their dreams, because. They're prophetic and what what the granddaughters actually drew and colored were hearts within hearts within hearts, all multicolored.

ts and adoptive parents, any [: 00:42:00

Laurin: Yes.

Kelly: How do we make sure that that light, that sacred worthiness is maintained and they glow? Straight into the into the world with their genius resilience and wisdom intact. That is something that we're creating right now. And that for me is what I am most excited about.

Laurin: Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's I have, I have friends who have these very awake granddaughters. And they are, you know, delighted with them because they're just so interesting and they are such a big light. One of them, the, from the time she could say a first word and in New York city, this little, little girl would say hi to everybody.

a live one here. All right. [: 00:43:00

Kelly: So, Laurin, 1 of the things I do for fun right now, and parents kind of are looking at me crazy. But when I see a little person, the littles. I get, I get at their level and I go, Hey, sweet, sweet one. Welcome to earth. And just for fun, just, just to see, and I got to tell you every child, this is how I know the light is still on.

Right. Every child is like, yes, thank you. And the parents looking at me like. What did she say? And I said, Oh, I was just welcoming them. I see. I got so excited to earth. And so my husband will have, you know, been with my husband 40 years. And so he'll just kind of try and turn away to kind of go, Oh, she's about to say it.

but I don't stop myself from [: 00:44:00

I do it in the grocery store, everywhere. And I got to tell you, Laurin, it lights me up and it lights them up. And then it lights their parents up to go. Well, some of them just move away from me as fast as possible, but others, Get curious, and they go, what did you, why are you saying that? What's happening? So, I just shared that with you, Laurin, because it felt to me like you could really appreciate.

Laurin: Oh, yeah, absolutely. I, I already make a habit of smiling at children, like in the grocery store or whatever, and you always get a big grin back. And, you know, even if they're like crying and cranking, I just go, hey there, and they light up. But I love that. Welcome to Earth. I'm going to remember that. So that's good.

So I noticed that you [: 00:45:00

Kelly: These are, these are key, because I got to tell you, the moment you ask yourself, is it possible that there's more to me and my family? And what I noticed is that in my own life, but then my family's life, and then another family's life. I noticed not just the merry go round of survival, but I've noticed the merry go round of spirit as well.

So we don't get off the merry go round. We just transform the merry go round, but I noticed 7 superpowers and they are these. The very 1st superpower that families have at their disposal is belief. Believe that they are not broken, they are becoming the greatest expression of love they have ever known.

er together and make it fun. [: 00:46:00

Integrate is the next superpower. Is the next 1 transformation, and then the greatest superpower that we have that we didn't realize we forgot was co creation. So, as families utilize their superpowers. And they navigate this within their daily lives. They begin to notice a different way of being. With themselves and each other, which ripples straight out into the world.

ars comforted me and I never [: 00:47:00

But the stars are stillness, thankfulness, affirmations, reflection, and showing up

Laurin: Mm.

Kelly: for ourselves. Our family others in our lives and the natural world. So look to the stars is the framework. That was downloaded naturally for me, based on my experience. And once I started those 5 steps every day. With intention, attention and inspired action.

Laurin: Mm. Mm

Kelly: I began to notice that everything shifted. It was easier to own my own shift. It was easier for me to allow the shift show of the world to be as it was and to know everything was fine.

Laurin: Mm hmm.

Kelly: So look to the stars, but the superpowers, see, we're all on a hero's journey.

and that was definitely the [: 00:48:00

To the human experience and and we really, our brains are wired to learn from story. So putting, bringing that story aspect into the work is really powerful. So I really, I appreciate that you use that. All right. Is there anything we haven't talked about yet that you would like to bring forth for the audience?

way. If you choose that, and [: 00:49:00

I choose and to own that as much as I could. That's all the heavy energy, it's all the shadows and it's all the light. We're here to dance. All the way through everything, and to do that. With love, self, love, self, compassion, self forgiveness. Self trust and self care, and because I did not know thyself, I went through the who do I have to be for you today phase, right?

am of is already waiting for [: 00:50:00

Laurin: Nice. Thank you. Thank you so much for that. All right. Can you let people know where they can find you and your book?

Kelly: Yes. And so if you would like to go all of the information, including the book, which is in every format and on audible and find a way voices and other materials and support that you can find is on one sacred family. com.

Laurin: All right. We'll have that in the show notes. So people can go click on it and they don't have to write it down. All right. Well, this has been a really lovely conversation. I there's, there's a lot of, So many little nuggets of wisdom that you have shared with us and in memorable ways. So it's, it's, I love the language that you use.

g to the language is really. [: 00:51:00

That's the one thing I would say, take your own pace, but it's, I just, the little bit of time I spent with it this morning. It's very powerful. It's very well thought out. It's very true to my experience. And so I really, I can highly recommend it for you. And I want to thank Kelly for being here with us and sharing her, her story and, and her amazing expertise and wisdom.

And I want to just invite all of you to join me again next week for another great conversation. And I want to invite you to do in the meantime, stay curious.

[: 00:52:00

Head over to my website HeartLightJoy.com. Until next time. I'm Laurin. Wittig stay curious.