Uplifting Leadership: Jamie Jones' Guide to Being Authentically You

Interview Episode with Jamie Jones

Jamie:

But that's what life is about. I believe life is about, it's okay to make a mistake. Just try not to repeat the same mistake. Make new mistakes. Because that's where we truly learn and we can adjust our patterns and become better versions of ourselves, sometimes in the midst of challenges or obstacles or what we perceive to be a failure.

Laurin: Hi, friends, and welcome. Welcome back to Curiously Wise. I'm so glad you're here. I'm doing something a little bit different today. I have a wonderful guest that I met recently. I was connected by a previous guest, which is my favorite way to meet people. And I'm starting on something new and it's an addition to what I'm already doing, but it's about illuminating the leadership within, particularly for women, but men need this too.

And everybody in between. So. I'm going to introduce you to Jamie. I've lost your last name, Jamie.

Jamie: Jones.

Laurin: I'm like, blank!

Jamie: It's okay.

Laurin: All right, well, we'll start off with laughter. That's a good way to start, right? I want to introduce you to Jamie Jones.

Jamie: Thank you so much.

Laurin: All right, Jamie, let me just read your bio for a minute and tell people about all the amazing things you've done. Because you are you're a wonderful individual here. Jamie is a soulful, warmhearted native of Petersburg, Virginia, which is not very far from where I live, who followed her dreams to Charlotte, North Carolina, in pursuit of a fulfilling career change.

With over a decade of experience in HR consulting, Jamie has dedicated her career to empowering and uplifting her colleagues in all things human resources related. She's a highly motivated people leader. I love that term. Jamie managed more than 100 direct reports and worked with five fortune 500 businesses.

Her leadership skills are unparalleled and she has a natural ability to cultivate powerful teams that thrive under her guidance. Jamie's passion for helping others goes beyond her professional life. She truly embodies the idea of leading with heart. And soul. And she has always been dedicated to healing and supporting those around her.

Her expertise in emotional intelligence, business acumen, and navigating corporate relationships has helped her direct reports achieve incredible success, both personally and professionally. Welcome to Curiously Wise, Jamie.

Jamie: Thank you. Thank you so much.

Laurin: Yeah. So today we're

Jamie: when you read it.

Laurin: What did you say?

Jamie: I said sounds great when you read it.

Laurin: Yeah. Well, you're, you're fabulous.

I mean, it's, I noticed that with your energy when I first was kind of checking you out before I contacted you and it was like, I need to, I need to meet this woman. So this is going to be a little bit different interview than I usually do because we usually dive right into the spiritual healing stuff, but we're going to talk about your spiritual journey first, but then we're going to talk about how that relates to your leadership.

Because I know you bring that spirituality into that. And it's, that's something I'm very interested in learning more about. So you're welcome. So let's start with, where did you get started on spirituality? How did you come into that?

Jamie: Yeah. Spirituality has been a part of my entire life. My foundation of spirituality is pretty much deep rooted in Christianity. From my upbringing back home in Petersburg. Sunday church was very common. Vacation Bible school, Sunday school, all of those things. However, I never really fully Felt aligned to the energy of Christianity, although I have a great deal of respect for the religion itself.

So I separated from religion as a young adult and I really didn't have much focus at all. I was just living my life. bUt around mid thirties, I had a very unique experience. I had a unique experience that was related to me having a seizure. I never had a seizure before. And what sort of led up to that seizure is that I was overindulging in THC.

I was a, I was a very heavy smoker and it wasn't good. for me because I wasn't using it in a way that was healthy. I was using it to sort of mask all of my issues, not dealing with what was going on inside of me. And I had a bad experience with it. So around 35, I had this seizure. I'm standing in my bed, my bathroom, and I'm getting ready to brush my teeth.

I just finished smoking. And I just saw my body just shaking and jolting in the mirror. And then it was complete blackness. I hit my head on the side of the bathroom door, and when I opened my eyes, I'm just basically looking directly in the mirror. And I felt that that was my soul. Sign from God showing me that if I stayed on this path, what my life would ultimately resort to.

so At that time I started to, I stopped smoking cold turkey, just got it out of my life. And I started reading different religions, started reading about the Quran. I went back to the King, King James version of the Bible, but still no true alignment. And then I sort of landed upon Buddhism and learning about the art of meditation and listening to your inner self.

And I don't necessarily identify as a Buddhist. I like to think that my spiritual journey is just that a spiritual journey with the universe and with God. So that horrible experience, I feel like it brought me closer to God, closer to myself. And my, my daily practice is meditation, mindfulness, grounding.

I have Paulo Santos right here on my desk, uh, and a lot of prayer so even though I don't necessarily align with a traditional religion, spirituality is really, it's it for me.

Laurin: Yeah, it's very similar to me actually in some ways. I grew up in the Episcopal church in the South. I grew up in Mississippi. So really South and did the, the, you know, Sunday school and vacation Bible school and, and the whole, the whole nine yards.

And in my early twenties, I left the church because of the misogyny in it.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: And so that was cause it just didn't, it, it, it twanged. It didn't feel harm harmonious to me as the way I like to think of it. But I do, I, I did learn a lot about the possibility of spirituality from the stories and things that I learned in that, that stage.

But I, I was like you, I was kind of lost in the, in the mist or without any real spiritual focus or, or understanding for quite a while. And my own, my own health was not great, but my son's health when he was born, he was, his immune system just wasn't working very well. And we were, he had food allergies and he had asthma and all this stuff as a, as a tiny little guy forced me.

To look at alternative ways of healing, which brought us to a Chinese doctor. And so being the curious person that I am, I was like, I got to learn about this. You know, I'm taking my child to an acupuncturist and herbalist, and I need to understand, you know, this. So I learned about Chi or the energy of the body and the meridian systems.

And then I had some myself to help with my allergies and had sort of miraculous changes. And so I agree that there's, there's. Those things that are physical change our course.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: And I think that's how spirit has to get our attention sometimes because I know I can be a little hardheaded.

Jamie: Oh, for sure. Me too.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. So I, I think that's a fairly common theme for people I've talked to on about their spiritual path is that often there is a health crisis.

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: And for me it was my son's health crisis, but still it was a health crisis that opened my eyes to sort of more than there is. Yeah. So what did you do once you sort of got that, into your life? You say you've got a regular meditation practice which is I always recommend, even though I'm not real good at doing it every day, but I, you know, I still, I still do it as often as I can. And and I give, I forgive myself when I can't do it every day.

But so, so how has, how has that changed your life? To bring the spirituality in, in a conscious purposeful way.

Jamie: It's, it's such a beautiful experience. In the ways that it's really even hard for me to describe, I'm not the same woman that I was two years ago or even five years ago. It changed how I not only saw myself, but allowed me to give compassion to others. I always had a very unique skill of connecting with people, but the mindfulness and the spirituality allowed my heart to expand in ways that I never really knew I was even capable of doing some of those things.

I really discovered the power of me. And the power of my spirit, through this transition. And I know that it's growing continuously and I'm gonna ride it. I'm gonna ride it out. I'm not gonna be afraid of, you know, the unknown or the unseen. I'm just gonna keep my faith extremely strong and continue to spread love wherever I go.

Yes.

Laurin: that. I love that. The power of you. That's awesome. That's yeah. It's, it's expansive. That's, I mean, change can be scary, but for me, I trust now that if it's, if it's led from my heart or it's led through a heart connection from my spirit guides who I'm very in touch with then it's, it's okay. I know I'm going to be safe.

It may be uncomfortable, but ultimately it's going to be for the best and the better and my highest good. And that always ripples out to everybody else. Right. So, you know, as we lift ourselves, we lift everybody else with us. And that's my goal in the world is let's lift as many people up into this. It's really more for me, it's a more peaceful way of living.

It's trying to think of the word it's easier.

Jamie: It is.

Laurin: It's easier. Yeah. It's

Jamie: The coping mechanisms that spirituality and faith it has a profound impact on your life. My ex would say years ago that I would get upset just at the drop of the dime, like the smallest little incident. And I'm on 10 when actually the incident is maybe a three. And she told me that she noticed that I was changing because I wasn't as reactive.

As I used to be, and I could just sort of take everything in stride and an ease and things that I had no control over it was okay to release those things.

Laurin: Yeah, that's exactly what I, I, I used to be hyper reactive, very emotional. You still have some of that in there, but it's, I think it's more genuine now. It's not just reaction. But one of the, one of the big lessons that I've learned, especially probably in the last five years is the, the, the amazing changes that can happen when you allow yourself to have a larger perspective, you get out of your own mess.

And I call it the Hawke's eye view. It's like you rise up out of yourself and you look at this, at the, the situation or the event or the people or whatever it is yourself from a more expansive place.

Jamie: yes,

Laurin: And and I do find that, that, that lack of reaction or it's not a lack, but it's a, it's a choice more, you know, it's like, cause I always step back now.

And I'm really gotten really good at this. I have to say in the last year or so, I've noticed that I've really begun to master this, to step back and go, how do I want to respond to that?

Jamie: exactly, exactly. It's, it's one of those practices that that I even teach in leadership that it's okay to step away. Gather yourself, understand how you want to approach the conversation. It makes a world of difference because sometimes when we're too reactive, we can be offensive in those moments.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. And as, as a woman who cries easily thankfully I have, it's not as much as it used to be. That used to be the first reaction for me is to cry. I think it was a, I know it was a safety thing. But you get dismissed as a woman. If you get teary or if

Jamie: Oh, most definitely.

Laurin: so for me being able to back up and go, okay.

I'm feeling a little emotional. Why? What's behind that? Do I want to react that way? If so, what is the right level of reaction? How can I speak from my heart? So I have all of these sort of, I guess, self coaching things that I do, like, how do I want to show up in that moment

Jamie: Absolutely.

Laurin: and how can I do it authentically?

So it's not putting on a facade. Right. Because authenticity, you talk about authenticity a lot. I'm going to, I'm going to show this. I got a, a, a free copy from Jamie of her book. And if you're not seeing this in video, it's called unlocking prosperity, seven essential strategies for thriving business relationships.

And it's a real quick read. It's not a big book, but it's, it's wonderful. But you talk about authenticity in there.

Jamie: Yes. Yeah.

Laurin: how do you feel that you maybe didn't show up authentically in the past that you do now? Mm

Jamie: Yeah. My transition to authenticity started as a young teen. I'm the first openly gay person in my family and it's a huge family. Huge. My, my dad is one of seven. My mom is one of 10. And there was no one in my family that looked like me and I, I felt like an alien. I totally felt that I didn't belong.

So I did a lot of things to be more normal, you know, as a young, as a young girl. And when I finally came out around, I guess I was about 18 or 19. Then it was still issues with authenticity because now that I'm out of living this rainbow life, I'm so happy, but now my, my masculine energy is overboard. So, so now I'm still not truly living in, in, in who I am as a woman.

So, because I, now I want to fit in with this crowd. And I don't believe that I really started to feel authentic until. Probably my early thirties when I started to accept myself for who I was, regardless of how people perceived me, you have to take it or you have to leave it. And I even still struggle at times now especially like if I'm going to meet with a client or if I'm having an interview I'm very conscious of.

My energy is it, is it a nice balance of masculine and feminine energy? Am I showing up truly as myself in those moments? Am I presenting myself in a way that I'm going to be accepted and my skill set is going to be needed? Or maybe even in a dating situation, you know, am I presenting myself in a way that she's going to be accepting of me, but my mindset now is to just truly show up as me?

And those people who align with my energy and align with my personality, they'll be there. And for anyone else, you know, I just wish them well. But it's a constant journey of showing up as my true and authentic self in all circles, in all aspects of life.

Laurin: And I like that you bring that up, that it's a journey. It's never complete. There's always more to learn. There's always more to grow and expand. And that's definitely, you know. Again, my experience I'm paralleling you quite nicely that I think I've mastered something and then something shows up in my life to prove that I have not yet mastered that thing.

And here's your opportunity to try it again.

Jamie: Yeah. But that's what life is about. I believe life is about, it's okay to make a mistake. Just try not to repeat the same mistake. Make new mistakes. Because that's where we truly learn and we can adjust our patterns and become better versions of ourselves, sometimes in the midst of challenges or obstacles or what we perceive to be a failure.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. So let's talk about how you bring this into your, your leadership because you, your job is to be a leader of people. I love that you, you call yourself a people leader. So you're not managing people, you're leading them. First of all, that's, I love language. So I love that. That's the way you've chosen to describe that.

And so how. You say you have this, you know, this innate ability to connect with people. And I totally believe that. sO how do you, you take that and even make it more potent with your spirituality?

Jamie: Yes, I started to I'll share maybe an experience. Very early in my corporate career, I I've recently gotten promoted. I had entry level job. I was in that role for maybe just a little under two years before I was promoted to a manager role. And I thought that I had it all figured out. I just knew everything, you know, I'm a subject matter expert.

I'm a Supreme coach. I can get it done. And I went into that role strictly with. thE concept of building relationships and I build relationships. Mostly through listening to people, understanding them, asking them questions, I believe that I can create a foundation where they feel safe and open and allow themselves to be vulnerable.

Now I can understand you a little bit better. And when I can understand you better. Now we can actually navigate what the which a work life balance could actually look like. And what I discovered years later. What I discovered is that when you really focus on the individual and making sure that their spirit is calm, they perform extremely well, extremely well.

And that's something that probably took the course of about four years. Because yes, I was promoted early and I built extremely strong relationships. I didn't know the art of management at the time. So I got demoted and I went into Facilitating and training. And that's when I learned more about the coaching side, not just building relationships, but how important coaching is to the concept of leading people as well.

Laurin: I, it's been years since I've been in a corporate. environment. I mean, it's been decades, but I've been, as I've been looking at what it means to be an illuminated leader. And then I met you and I've read your book. It's, it's really brought back. I worked on a team back in the eighties, really dating myself here at the international monetary fund in their bureau of computing services, which was still a pretty new thing in the business world at the time.

And I was lucky enough to be. Hijacked from my train, my computer training job, somebody from the the IMF came to take a class and I was the teacher and they then began trying to recruit me and I resisted for about 18 months cause I wasn't ready to leave what I was doing, but I finally landed in this team there that was led by a woman who's higher up was also a woman.

And it was such a joyful place to work.

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: And, and the team clicked and the team morphed over. I was there for 6 and a half years and the team morphed over that time. People came and went, but there was a core of us of about 5 people who are always sort of the main ones on there. And looking back, I see. All the things that you were talking about in your book about, you know, Susan was, I was my immediate boss and she, she knew everybody.

She knew about everybody's life. She would ask about, you know, we didn't have kids at the time, but your kids or your, how's your mom doing? Or, you know, where'd you go on vacation and whatever it was, she would get personal with you in a, in an appropriate way. And then she would also orchestrate group activities.

So we'd have dinner at her house, or we'd go out for dinner, or we'd all go have lunch together, you know, once a week or something. And we always celebrated everybody's birthday by going out for lunch and the lunch was on Susan, you

Jamie: Even better.

Laurin: Yeah. So so. I didn't realize that those are really good leadership things to do and they, and they made it such a joyful group to be in.

Everybody loved working on that. We were the most successful team in that Bureau, because if they, and they, some people like, we're trying to sabotage. We were all almost all Americans for a while in this very multicultural place. And there were, so there were some people trying to like, yeah, sabotage you or higher up, but but the women protected us and.

Yeah. They kept giving us harder and harder deadlines to meet for these massive projects. And we met every single one of them. And it was because we, we liked each other. We collaborated well, we worked together, you know, it was just, and I never really had thought about how that was different from anywhere else because it's the only corporate environment I've ever been in.

But it was, it's. I, I feel like I need to call Susan and say, thank you for being such a great leader.

Jamie: it's rare. It's rare that and I worked alongside a lot of, you know, really great managers. But it's rare to build a very genuine connection. And I think that when people understand that you genuinely care about them. That changes the concept that this is just not a work task. We're actually building towards something outside of ourselves.

There were even times where we would host meditation sessions and, you know, we would do breath work. All of those things matter, you know, when you're anxious and you're full of anxiety and it's a tough day. Let's step away. Let's go in the room. Let's talk about it. And you can come back. Maybe 30 minutes or so, but you can finish out your shift.

You don't have to call out for the rest of it.

Laurin: Right. So do you think there's a difference? And I, I know the answer is yes, but so let's look at how it's different if it's a more masculine energy leader versus a more feminine energy leader. And I'm using the energy on purpose because I know there are some wonderfully balanced men and there's some wonderfully balanced women.

And then there's, you know, the rest of us, I'm way more feminine energy than masculine. So. Just if you could talk a little bit about that, because I know you've been in a lot of different environments and you've had a number of managers of yourself. So

Jamie: Yeah. It's very different. Masculine energy is very different. I can even think about one of my most recent clients And there were two executives one male the other female The male executive looked at everything very black and white very rapid fire fast No time for growth He, he just wanted it super quickly, although the feminine energy, the female, she was more nurturing, a little bit more understanding.

And it was a. I preferred actually working with her a little bit more because it allowed me to actually have a conversation and communicate. I think communication really is also a very important foundation when it comes to building those relationships. And I've worked alongside some really strong male leaders in the corporate world.

And then I've worked along some male leaders that had difficulty building relationships with the female direct reports. They did well with the males, but they were unable to really build a genuine connection with some of the female staff. And to be honest, I still haven't really truly discovered why.

When I look at my own experience, most of my leaders have been female. But I've had two strong male, um, managers who did, I think they did a good job at building relationships in the corporate space,

Laurin: since.

Jamie: but it's, it's a very unique dynamic.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah, it is. It is. It's, and again, hearkening back to the international monetary fund because Americans were a minority there. It's a very international organization. One of our next higher ups, we always had the same woman, Susan, who was our, our team leader, but her boss changed periodically. And the, the second one that we had was a man, but he was Italian, but he's Italian who had lived in the U S a long time.

So he had that. That love of women, I want to say that the Italians, you know, are very free about expressing and and he actually was a really good, very balanced energy kind of leader and he supported Susan in the way she ran the team.

Jamie: Good.

Laurin: So that was, you know, that was important because we did have just before I left, we got Susan's boss who was.

Not, not easy to work for Mm-Hmm.

Jamie: I've seen those experiences. You mentioned something that made me think about the male and female dynamic. I have heard some male leaders speak in a negative tone about women being overly emotional. And I believe that male and female energy is very emotional, we just display it very differently. And in some cases, as you stated earlier, it's frowned upon for women, a woman to cry in the workplace, because now I'm no longer taken seriously.

And that's something that still bothers me just slightly because I want someone to be expressive in their emotions, whether it's crying or whether it's rage, if it's just us in a room, get it out and then, then let's talk about it. Let's figure out what the next step is after you have allowed yourself to feel that matters.

Laurin: Yeah. I agree with that. We, a lot of the healing work that I do is because people have swallowed their emotions, you know, stuffed them down, and now they're making their body hurt, and now they're need, you know, now they have to deal with them.

Jamie: exactly. You have no

Laurin: a supported coaching, you know, kind of environment too.

So all right. So that's okay because my, my, passion with this idea of the illuminated leader is really around women because I was. I ducked leadership for a lot of my life, um, because I didn't want to be responsible. I didn't want to be in the, in the target zone. You know, if, if something went wrong, I grew up in a family where it wasn't okay to make a mistake.

So, you know, fine. I don't want to lead. But looking back, I was pushed to be a leader in many, you know, in many situations, I voluntarily have stepped into leadership a couple of times because nobody else was going to do it.

Jamie: You're right. You had no choice.

Laurin: Yeah, and I was very doubtful about my ability to lead because I didn't know. That I have innate leadership, but an ability, and I believe we all do.

yoU know, especially for me becoming a mom and then becoming a stay at home mom, which I never intended to do, but was needed for my family's sake, suddenly I'm in charge of everything.

Jamie: You're

Laurin: I'm not working for somebody else anymore. I'm a CEO and, and, and I had to figure out how to make it work, you know, and, and intuitively I did that.

I was not one to sit back and going, Oh, how am I going to manage all this? I would cry. I would journal. I would then figure out something I intuitively, I now know I now call it a download. I get an intuitive download or, you know, spirit and universe would guide me in some way. To assist me. And and so I want to help people learn how to accept that

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: honor it, allow it to be expressed.

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: And I think we're at a tipping point in, in our chaos, the chaos of the world, the chaos of the patriarchy, energy and structure. I think we're at a tipping point now where we're going to be. Needing more and more women to step up into leadership, into conscious leadership, but with this feminine energy and with the heart energy that love, you know, heart centered leadership is what I'm going to call it.

And so how would you help somebody, somebody like me in my earlier days? Did not, was not comfortable being put in that spotlight of leadership. Not even the term. I don't make me the leader. hoW would you help somebody navigate, you know, at least the first steps of that?

Jamie: Yeah. That's a great question. Because there's a lot of people who don't want the responsibility of being a leader. So I, I, I, I always take it back to communication because that's the foundation. I really like to understand what your goals are, what your desires are, what do you feel like is your natural skills, something that just comes to you naturally doesn't require a lot of effort.

And once we figure out and determine what that is, then I can actually start giving you certain tasks. Giving you responsibility just in that particular scope itself. And once you get comfortable taking on that task, leaving the word leadership out of it, right? Because that could be a trigger word, so I certainly wouldn't use those words.

But allowing you to be in a space where you can be authentic. And you can be happy doing a task or a skill once you get into that rhythm before you know it, you're leading that entire you're leading the project. And I've done that with so many of my direct reports who Jamie, I don't want to be a manager.

I see how stressed out you are. I don't want to be a manager, but you love doing casework. You love doing analysis. So, so now let's, let's have some fun in that scope and that's typically how I start by truly identifying what someone loves, what they're naturally gifted at, and then allowing them to explore in that space.

Laurin: resonates with me a lot and I can see how that, how I was led into some leadership positions that way. Yeah. Just come do this. You like doing this. Come do this right here.

Jamie: little Jedi mind trick.

Laurin: Now teach this other person how to do that too.

Jamie: Now oversee and fact check and make sure they did it

Laurin: Yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I always thought of that more as being a mentor or, or, you know, just a teacher, but that is, that is a definitely, I can see that path to leadership.

Jamie: yeah, it works.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. And that interestingly to me, looking back, cause I, cause that's one of the ways I learn about this stuff is I look back at my own life and go, okay, where did these things start to, to show up for me?

But it's I have always been a good teacher. And so I was often recruited in some teaching form. The IMF hired me to help their teaching their, their. Their teaching staff developed curriculum and, and, and coached them on their teaching styles and stuff. Cause that's what I've been doing. And and it, then it just kind of morphed into eventually I, I was an editor and a writer for them, which is what I ended up doing later in in fiction form.

So yeah, so it was, it's, I love that because it's not just, you have to step into being a leader. It's a path. It's a path. It's a journey. Like, okay, I'm getting goosebumps. It's a journey. See, I'm learning. This is, this is why I like talking to people. Cause I get to learn, I get curious and ask questions and put the pieces together for myself and I hope that helps the listeners as well.

But that, okay. That's like a golden nugget right there is that you don't have to step into being. The leader right away, you can, you can just have the journey that may or may not put you in that what you call leadership. I called it motherhood,

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: And I, that's why I really, I think everybody has some place in their lives. Where they already are a leader in some way,

Jamie: Absolutely.

Laurin: you know, and they just, we don't call it that.

Jamie: Yes,

Laurin: So I, I, this is where I want to illuminate these things, you know, I want to bring it up and go, you don't have to be afraid of being a leader because you already know how to do this or this.

And

Jamie: Yeah,

Laurin: that's

Jamie: like to look at it as you're already the project manager of your own life. You are in complete control of your own actions, you're managing yourself on a daily basis. If you have a family you're not just managing yourself but you're managing your family as well. And it doesn't have to be in the workplace, we're already leading.

Laurin: Yeah. So many women in, I know in my mother, my grandmother's generation, especially my grandmother's generation, my mom was a feminist. She was working her whole life, but they, they provided service. You know, my grandmother led the altar guild at the Episcopal church, you know, and they were responsible for making sure it was pretty and clean and all that kind of stuff, or, you know, she did service for some other organization or, and then ended up organizing things for them, you know, so I know that there's a lot of that in the, in the sort of female culture of, of Of the world where we don't always get seen as leaders in the patriarchal kind of sense, but we are, we are taking care of other things as leaders.

And I work with a lot with women's circles. And I think that's how we lead is often in community. Like you say, with communication, where there may be somebody who this time, because we're working on this issue, she's going to step up and kind of get us organized. But next time it's going to be this other person because that's her area of joy and experience.

And so it's not a one leader. It's a community of leaders.

Jamie: Absolutely. And it offers balance and you're able to accomplish that one goal.

Laurin: And you

Jamie: not about ego. You got to remove the ego.

Laurin: You have to. And you don't have to be able to do everything yourself. Yeah.

Jamie: That's the best part for me because I'll get overwhelmed.

Laurin: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I'm currently a one man, a one woman business here and it's like, I can't wait to hire some other

Jamie: yeah, for sure.: 2024

Laurin: Yep. Yep. Yep. Yeah. So it's I, I, I am embracing the I need a community.

Yeah. All right. So what have we not talked about that you would like to bring forth

Jamie: Hmm.

Laurin: it doesn't even have to be about what we've talked about. I mean, it's just, if there's something else,

Jamie: I think. Yeah. So let's talk a little bit. I like to explore a little bit about my approach when I, I come into a business and they want me to sort of give their leadership a facelift. And there's something that I have discovered with a couple of my clients. When I come in for the pre interview and I'm speaking with the executive or the business owners, it's always about My staff isn't doing this.

They're not showing up for work. They don't listen. It's all about the staff. And sometimes I just laugh just a little bit on the inside because They never understand they're primarily responsible for the actions of the staff and for anyone who is interested in hiring me as a consultant for their business relationships.

It's always a very delicate dance with myself and the executives that they don't, they're not always aware of. Prior to hiring me, but I'm not just there to coach their staff and their managers. I'm also there to coach them and and and and I have to sometimes identify Behaviors in them that that could be impacting the growth of the business and the business relationships.

And that's always a little disappointing to me when the executive isn't willing to take that mindset shift as well, is not willing to be receptive to the coaching and the mentorship to make those changes. And a lot of times when I come in and I give that coaching to the leadership staff. or The executives, they just blow it off and they never change.

And then sometimes they can come back and ask, well, Jamie, I saw major growth in the staff here, but we still have this area, this area in this area. That's not changing. And sometimes it's difficult for them to understand that maybe we can't reach the top of our goal list. you're not willing to make the adjustments either.

Just hiring me isn't a magic wand. I just, it just doesn't change that easily. You'll see a lot of shifts. However, business owners is sometimes the toughest part of the transition. And I really want to continue to do work in that space. And gain experience in that space, because I really want the businesses to grow in a way that they've shared with me during those consultations and those sort of pre interviews.

Laurin: yeah, come fix everybody else.

Jamie: Exactly. Exactly.

Laurin: I can see where, yeah, if, if the person in charge is not willing to shift their, their energy. Yep. They're, you know, which is their, you know, the basis of how they, they are in the, in their world, how they present themselves then. Yeah. So you're not going to get a lot of change, not especially, it might change while you're there, but I bet a lot of times it shifts back to old habits because the top hasn't changed.

Jamie: Exactly. And that's always a little disappointing to me because I want to be successful. It's not just about gaining a client. I really want to see positive change in people. Because I believe that when we're able to sort of make adjustments in ourselves is also when we can also offer those blessings to others.

Laurin: Yeah. So when you go into a corporate environment, how open with your spirituality are you?

Jamie: Oh, extremely.

Laurin: Okay, good.

Jamie: I don't really hide anything.

Laurin: Yeah.

Jamie: I'm very transparent based off of any questions anyone may, may ask. I'm very open, even not just about my spirituality, I'm open about my sexuality, simply because if you are hiring me to be your culture curator, understand that I'm going to bring all facets of my life to your organization, because I have to look at, Everything from an unbiased perspective.

I like to remove myself but also use my own personal life experiences and experiences that I've had with other clients to make really strong decisions. so Yeah, I don't hide much.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. It's because I, that's something that I've struggled with. And, and I'm, I'm still struggles, not the right word worked on, you know, journeyed through is how are other people going to perceive me if I go, well, I talked to my guides this morning.

Jamie: Yeah. My spiritual team.

Laurin: My spiritual team, I call them my all y'all, I have so many, it's like or, you know, if I talk about working with the energy of something or someone and, and most of the people I know are tolerant, but are like, there goes weird Lauren again.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: So I'm getting more comfortable with it, but it's been a journey.

It's been a journey for sure. My podcast was part of me getting comfortable with it, you know, in a real public way.

Jamie: You know, I agree with that. Me starting the business path to peace. It's really been my journey to peace because it's helped me in so many ways and You mentioned about spirituality and I was working with a christian based company over the summer and someone from from the organization asked me if I wanted to go to church with them And I was just like no, thank you you know, I was like, thank you for the offer, but you know, i'm not a christian and they were a little taken back, but I think it's important for me to always be authentic.

I believe in God. I believe in the higher power. I believe in the power of the universe. But I don't necessarily believe that I have to be in alignment with the, with the religion. In order to follow my spirit and allow God to enter my life.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. I, I have come to think of religion as the structure

Jamie: Yes,

Laurin: and, and spirituality as the point.

Jamie: that's it. And it's a very personal journey. It's a very personal experience. And I, I truly like learning from my own personal experience with spirituality versus someone else's experience.

Laurin: Yeah, I agree with that. It is, it's a unique journey for each of us. We've come here with, with a purpose, , you know, some things we want to learn, things we want to you know, try again, things we want to clear out from, you know, past lives or a lot of ancestral work lately for. Everybody I'm working with.

So we come here with, you know, with a game plan,

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: but we don't always know what that game plan is.

Jamie: We don't. Yeah. Discovering it each day.

Laurin: Yes. Yeah.

Jamie: I think it's revealing itself to me. Yeah.

Laurin: Exactly. And I, you know, I used to, I used to want to go from point A to point B. It's like, okay, I see, I see where I want to be. I'm going to go straight there. It's like, oh, no, you're not, you're going to go on this long journey.

Jamie: Yes, you are. And sometimes you even have to go

Laurin: Yes.

Jamie: It's not always forward movement.

Laurin: Try it again.

Jamie: yeah.

Laurin: I've made peace with that. It's like, okay, it's going to be whatever it's going to be.

Jamie: Exactly.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. So for me, this, this podcast was a real, you know, I, I call it coming out because it, it, for me, it was coming out of the darkness and being, being the light I am in the world in a super public way.

Jamie: that's beautiful. But it allows you to present yourself more authentically which, which creates self acceptance and self love and self worth.

Laurin: also creates practice, you know, because I've, I could be, I could switch off the blue and go and be, you know, the Lauren I used to be and. And I had a few friends where I really felt like I could be my authentic self for a while. Now this is me. This is just me

Jamie: yes.

Laurin: and I don't edit it out and I let things fly the way they want to go.

And and I'm living more and more authentically that way. It's a journey, it's a

Jamie: It is.

Laurin: but it's it's a lovely journey.

Jamie: I've also noticed that when you're sort of ascending to your higher self and you're transitioning that you lose people along the way and that part is is a part of the journey that I'm not sure I was actually prepared for.

Laurin: Yeah. . Yeah.

Jamie: That part of the journey.

Laurin: fears actually about the journey was losing people, and what I've found is that the people that love me for exactly who I am, even if they didn't know who that was,

Jamie: Mm hmm.

Laurin: are the people who are still with me

Jamie: Yes.

Laurin: and the people that were friends of the moment, which were one wonderful.

That was exactly, you know, the friendships I needed and I was able to provide in that moment. They're perfectly wonderful people. But I'm not, we're not in the same place anymore. And that can be family members. It can be for me, it's been mostly my friends, my friend groups have shifted over the years. But to me, that was the biggest fear.

I'm not going to be loved if I'm exactly who I am, you know, cause it's too weird.

Jamie: It is. You know, I know I'm a bit out there at times. I have a good friend and I share with her. You're the only one that I feel like I can truly be myself around without being looked at Like I'm an alien, but now I just accept my own weirdness and or what people may perceive to be weirdness But I feel more like myself than I ever did before

Laurin: Yes. Yes. I do too. I feel like I've been lately, I've been looking back at myself as a, as a young child. Where I was full of like, I know what's going on and I'm, you know, I was, they called me bossy a lot. I was a leader and, and I'm like, wow, where did that little girl go? You know? And so she's reemerging.

And, and as that, as I embrace that that wonderful energy, I came into the world with and bring it back into my heart. That and accept it for all, you know, everything it is I find myself much more at peace with just being my weirdo self.

Jamie: yeah, I love that

Laurin: Yeah. So it's, I think, you know, the culture we live in is not an easy one to, to grow up in, especially if you are not going to fit the mold and nobody fits the mold.

Jamie: no exactly not if you're living authentically

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, if you're, if you're shoving yourself into that, it's going to show up in some way in your life that is not fun and make you, or hopefully help you redirect into a more loving and joyful and authentic life. Oh

Jamie: for sure. I had a really tough experience around the age of 28. I called a family member to, to share with her a dream that I had. And it felt like it was sort of in alignment with with religion and God. And I told her about what happened in that dream. And I still somewhat regret sharing that experience with her, uh, even today, um, because.

She took advantage of my vulnerability in that moment and completely flipped it to her own narrative about me being a lesbian and not being able to be allowed into heaven, that God is, you know, going to deem me to hell. It was, it was such a tragic experience. And she spoke to me probably about an hour and 20 minutes.

And, you know, I think that was also one of the other. One of the other key points in my life that I knew that I couldn't be a part of the structure of the religion because of the rules and because of how I was perceived. Yeah. So, yeah, now I just accept my weirdness.

Laurin: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: You know, I'm like, yeah, I'm weird,

Jamie: Yeah.

Laurin: but I'm having so much fun being

Jamie: Exactly. Exactly.

Laurin: All right. I think that's a good place to stop for, for today because I think we've come full circle back to just being authentic, being, being happy with who you are and enjoying the journey. Even when it's hard. If you can, you know, step back a little bit and say, I don't know what's going to come out of this, but I know it's going to be for my best good and and let it flow.

I think that's good. Yeah.

Jamie: I love

Laurin: All right. And be a leader of a people leader, lead yourself. Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah, for sure. Start there.

Laurin: Yeah. Yeah. Let's lead ourselves into, into the light. There's a wonderful song now. I can't catch it right now, but it's about, it's time for us as women to lead ourselves back into the light, um, into the, well, it is in the in the song, but anyway.

I'll have to find that one. All right, Jamie, tell us where people can find you, how they could work with you, whatever you want to tell them.

Jamie: yeah, for sure. So you can visit my website, which is pathtopeacelifecoaching. com that will lead you to all of my social media website social media sites and pages. You can learn a little bit more about the services and products that I offer. I have a free leadership webinar, actually, that's starting.

Next month, January the 11th at 7 p. m. Eastern and it's, it's titled Leadership Liftoff, so I'll be going through conflict resolution, performance management, effective coaching we'll talk through the mindset shift, and during that webinar, I'll have Some a lot of free giveaways of the book.

I have these conversation card starters that, that I'll, that I'll be giving away and we'll do some discounts for coaching services and for the self guided course as well as a five week course that we have available, that'll be launching on January 1st.

Laurin: Awesome. Awesome. I love that you've got it all in like one place. That's what I try to do because it's like there's too many different other links.

Jamie: Right. Yeah.

Laurin: That information in the the show notes and I will get Jamie to give me the links or whatever is necessary to sign up for the webinar. And cause I know if you are looking at leadership.

We want to just learn how to lead yourself better, even that you're going to learn a lot from her. And plus she's just got such a beautiful energy. It's lovely to be in her company.

Jamie: Thank you so much.

Laurin: You're welcome. Thank you for being here with us today. And I want to thank the listeners and eventually the viewers when this gets out to YouTube, which I keep saying, but it will happen.

And I want to thank you for being here with us today and joining in on this conversation. I hope that you have illuminated something within yourself and that you stay curious. Have a great day. .

Thank you so much for joining us today on Curiously Wise. I hope this conversation has left you feeling inspired and curious about the world around and within you. After all, curiosity is the key to growth and understanding. So keep asking questions and exploring new ideas. If you enjoyed this episode, please consider subscribing and or leaving a review.

It helps us be found by others. If you're curious to learn more about me or my healing practice, heartlight wellness, head over to my website at heartlightjoy. com. Until next time, I'm Laurin Wittig. Stay curious.